I Have Returned, but I Cannot Lay down My Gun
Chapter 1 Table of contents

〈Chapter 1〉 0 – Welcome Back.

 

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=[…Detection of causality and multiple collisions.]

 

=[Setting observation area. Ghost Eye in operation….]

 

=[Continuous observation of ‘fall’.]

 

=[Identified the intersection collision of three causalities.]

 

=[Suggestion: Establish spacetime coordinates for resuming connection. Power for artificial probability stabilizer. At least two high-level field agents.]

 

=[Identified causality connection point: Smartphone in possession and 24 images including the file name 20250314_0004.jpg.]

 

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=[Two top-grade field agents have entered and are cleaning up.]

 

=[Anchor linkage of artificial probability stabilizer completed.]

 

­[…….]

 

=[Identified return of two field agents and ■■■, original causality.]

 

=[Record: Success]

 

Thud.

 

A heavy object collided with the floor.

 

However, the small sound echoed throughout the relatively small room, making it hard to believe it was from such a collision.

 

The clattering noise of equipment hitting each other followed.

 

But even that noise subsided. Silence so thick it seemed one could hear a pin drop crushed the air.

 

Only the sound of metal scraping lingered in the ears.

 

───Hoo.

 

And amidst it all, a figure emerged.

 

Long black hair naturally fell between the plate frames, dusted with stone powder on top.

 

Pointed ears stuck out, with a bullet-shaped hairpin faintly visible above them.

 

A sharp jawline visible above a black neck warmer. White skin contrasting sharply with the glossy black hair and the flushed lips.

 

Small breaths leaked out.

 

In the middle of a living space that felt desolate due to the lack of its owner, despite being well-organized.

 

She pulled out a pistol from a holster instead of her usual machine gun and held a tactical knife in the other hand.

 

However.

 

“…What?”

 

The place was familiar to her.

 

A scene she could never forget, becoming clearer the more desperate her life became, was in front of her.

 

Combat skills ingrained in her body and rationality honed like a blade to stay calm in any situation couldn’t stop the flood of longing that washed over her like a tidal wave.

 

Her deep blue eyes, visible through the scope, trembled.

 

Emotions so overwhelming that it was hard to breathe caused the muzzle to lower.

 

“…How….”

 

Words slipped out unconsciously.

 

She wished this scene wasn’t a dream.

 

If it were a dream, she didn’t want to wake up.

 

In the four years thrown into a hell manifested in the human world, she had never completely forgotten this memory, even if it had become blurry.

 

The desperation was so strong that she couldn’t even feel the pain from biting her lip hard enough to draw blood from her sharp fangs.

 

The scent of gunpowder always lingering in the air, the dust of shattered city fragments. The smell of concrete. The burning smell that the cold winter wind couldn’t cover.

 

The sound of gunfire ringing in her ears every day….

 

But all of that had disappeared.

 

Her body, which seemed ready to collapse at any moment, staggered.

 

───Swoosh.

 

Barely managing her trembling hands, she removed her Mechanics Wear gloves.

 

Her actions of touching the furniture while spitting out fragmented words looked pitiful.

 

Her grip tightened as if not wanting to lose the previous image she barely managed to capture in her eyes. Tears fell on her white hands.

 

She cried silently. Cried so hard without making a sound, even though her chest felt like it was about to burst.

 

On a winter day when she had once cried out loud, she had to kill a mob that came looking for her after hearing her cries.

 

In a place where even crying as she pleased wasn’t allowed, she had to learn how to cry as quietly as possible.

 

But.

 

“…Hoo, Ugh, Ugh…Hoo, Hoo…!”

 

At least for today, she couldn’t do that.

 

Her legs lost strength as she tried to move and she fell to her knees at the entrance.

 

The torrent of intense emotions broke the dam and turned her sobs into wails.

 

She tried to cover it with her hands, but tears continued to overflow.

 

The emotions and pain accumulated over the past four years, mixed with her cries, were not something a person could control on their own.

 

───Beep!

 

A light blinked from her wrist as she wept as if her breath would stop.

 

A flood of information surged in.

 

­Network disconnection confirmed. Rebooting the information control and local support system, ICARUS….

 

­Reboot complete. Beginning data aggregation.

 

­Identifying accessible networks. Attempting linkage between satellite network and owned electronic devices, data pairing….

 

­Connection complete.

 

Numerous letters floated before her eyes and disappeared repeatedly.

 

The golden letters, looking almost reverent at first glance, didn’t appear before her eyes as she cried and collapsed with her eyes closed.

 

Inside, so clean that it was hard to believe it was a living space. Footprints she left as she walked over the smoothly cleaned floor.

 

Old concrete, dust, metal fragments, and blood mixed in the footprints. Things that couldn’t coexist with the concept of a home.

 

They indicated the path she had walked.

 

She had left many things behind.

 

Things a person should never let go, but she had to learn the skills to kill people just to avoid dying.

 

She had accepted that she couldn’t go back and had ingrained sensations that should never become familiar deep into her bones.

 

It took just a few years for the twenty years of her past to be completely crushed.

 

Memories she didn’t want to forget and memories she wanted to forget twisted her chaotic mind even more. The memory of shooting until the smell of gunpowder couldn’t leave her body, the memory of taking a life for the first time, the blood flowing on the piled snow, the gradually scattering gaze and life.

 

The Milky Way seen above the clear sky. The many people she had decided to protect. Reliable teammates, the younger ones she wanted to take care of more.

 

The shame she felt from realizing she was still alive rather than having killed the enemy, and the praise gained from saving lives. The sense of duty that filled her increasingly numb heart.

 

All of those collided randomly.

 

The tears soaking her uniform’s sleeves contained all those emotions.

 

Among all the dreadful things in the world, despite everything, the moments that shone within them.

 

She didn’t know why she was crying. There were too many things she had left behind there to simply be happy about returning.

 

But one thing was clear.

 

The last line floated before her eyes.

 

­[Welcome back home, Yoo Jin.]

 

She would no longer suffer.

 

­Updating personal data….

 

­Operator name: Lee Yoo Jin.

 

­Origin/Hometown: Unknown…… ­> Seoul, South Korea.

 

­Age: Unknown…… ­> 24.

 

­Track record: Unknown.

 

­Height: 171cm.

 

­Weight: ■■■kg.

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­[D+1700. Return]

 

Information Control And Regional Uniting Support System, or ICARUS, is a secret organization directly under the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, established under Presidential Directive 51.

 

It was created to maintain the continuity of government facilities in times of war or disaster, prevent terrorism, and ensure the operation of information and communication facilities, power plants, gas and oil facilities, banking and financial systems, transportation and water supply, and emergency medical systems.

 

Through various simulations, the U.S. government considered how national chaos caused by nuclear events, pandemics, terrorism, cults, or undefined neurotoxins could paralyze the functions of the U.S. government, and sought ways to overcome such a total functional collapse.

 

The result was the ICARUS system and its subordinate tactical support agents, who prioritize maintaining and reconstructing government functions to end chaos.

 

They possess unlimited access to hidden panic rooms, armed safehouses, and arsenals scattered throughout society.

 

To support these agents effectively, these protocols also allow them to bypass and penetrate various electronic security standards circulated within the U.S., even after the situation is resolved or the government’s functions are restored to more than 30% of normal.

 

This remains effective unless a separate direct order is issued by a commander or someone ranked within the top five presidential succession line.

 

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ICARUS agents are usually selected from units within the U.S. Special Operations Command (USSOCOM) with extensive urban combat experience, who have a clear vision and outstanding dedication to the country.

 

Their locations are tracked in real-time as long as they possess a device, and fallen agents are immediate elimination targets.

 

However, in situations classified as Category 3 or higher, where the loss rate of deployed ICARUS agents exceeds 20% or they are deemed annihilated, new agents can be selected based on recommendations and approvals from existing agents.

 

These candidates must quickly arrive at HQ for a physical test to determine their deployment eligibility.

 

Unlike other personnel who undergo various training to navigate difficult terrains in other countries, ICARUS agents require extremely high cardiovascular endurance and physical strength, unmatched by other agents.

 

They prioritize mastering the use of numerous firearms, basic and advanced explosives, enemy communication interception and network setup, interrogation techniques and psychology, government building structures and vulnerabilities, protection methods, and advanced/complex CQB.

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