Recently, I was gradually starting to understand the joy of eating. Although I couldn’t eat much, there was no disagreement that a short meal was satisfying.
Because of that, the chef, Geum Baekcheon, was suffering every day. He prepared and brought food that I could eat, but most of them required a lot of work.
I told him it was okay and that simple things like dumplings or noodles were fine too, but Geum Baekcheon shook his head firmly and said it was his job.
Of course, the food tasted excellent thanks to his efforts, but the problem was that I couldn’t finish all of it.
When I couldn’t finish even the reduced portions he brought and had to put down my chopsticks, I felt embarrassed and apologetic.
I wanted to reciprocate his kindness and efforts, but that was just a thought.
Still, there were no major incidents. After moving to Hyuk Dojin’s room, no one suddenly barged in anymore.
As a result, time passed quietly and calmly.
It was a morning about ten days after arriving at the Demon Cult. As usual, during my meal with Hyuk Dojin, he casually opened his mouth.
“How is your body today, Sowol?”
Body? I tilted my head while bringing bok choy* to my mouth. (tl/n: a type of Chinese cabbage)
Nothing had really changed when he asked. After chewing and swallowing the finely chopped spinach, I lightly said:
“I’m fine.”
Hyuk Dojin seemed relieved by my answer, softly smiling as he put down the teacup in his hand. The teacup made a soft tapping sound against the table, followed by Hyuk Dojin’s voice.
“Then, could you spare some time for me?”
“Time… how much?”
My condition hadn’t worsened, but it wasn’t good either, so I didn’t want to overexert myself unnecessarily. Since I hadn’t told Hyuk Dojin the details, I cautiously asked, and he spoke slowly.
“Just for a bit.”
A bit couldn’t mean half a day, right?
After briefly pondering his request for time without explaining what it was about, I nodded. Hyuk Dojin’s expression brightened as if relieved.
I glanced at Joo Hwarin, but she shook her head lightly, seemingly unaware of the situation too.
It must be an important matter.
“Is it an urgent matter?”
“If you call it urgent, then yes, it is urgent.”
“Can you tell me what it is?”
“It’s nothing. There’s just something Sowol needs to see, so if you could spare some time, that would be enough.”
When he said there was something I needed to see, I tilted my head, and Hyuk Dojin rolled his eyes to look at the bowl in front of me. Although the portion wasn’t large, I hadn’t been able to finish it today either.
As his gaze lingered on the remaining food, I calmly put down the chopsticks in my hand. I couldn’t eat any more anyway.
Hyuk Dojin’s eyes gently rolled to meet my gaze.
“Have you finished your meal?”
“Yes.”
“Then let’s go right away. It seems better to show you than to tell you.”
He stood up from his seat, approached me, and extended his hand. I placed my hand on his palm and stood up, leaning against him.
I followed behind Hyuk Dojin as he took the lead and walked down the corridor. In the middle of our walk, Hyuk Dojin glanced at me and said:
“The weather is getting much hotter. In the case of the main school located on the Hundred Thousand Daesan Mountains, it stays cool even in summer, but even then, there are one or two months of scorching heat during the summer. It seems we’re in that period right now.”
“Come to think of it, it does feel a bit warmer.”
Since the windows were kept closed all day to block the sunlight, the lack of ventilation made the room feel very hot. Because of that, even my usually cool body was sweating.
Hyuk Dojin lightly smiled at my words and gently raised his eyebrows. His black eyes were staring intently at me.
As if asking why he was staring, I met his gaze, and a small smile formed on Hyuk Dojin’s lips.
“Still, summer is better than winter. Winter at the Hundred Thousand Daesan Mountains is famously harsh. The cold can freeze your skin to the point where people freeze to death in their homes. Moreover, winter is quite long, making this area feel like a frozen mountain range.”
“I see.”
Come to think of it, there was a similar story in the original work. Moyong Do wandered through the frozen mountain ranges searching for Moyong Sowol’s body. In the blizzard, he aimlessly roamed the ranges, calling out his sister’s name with no response.
…Anyway, why did he suddenly bring up the seasons? Was it related to the matter he wanted me to spare time for?
After walking for a while, Hyuk Dojin opened the door to a room in one of the buildings and entered. Following him inside, a fairly spacious area came into view.
At first glance, it felt like a storage room. However, it wasn’t cluttered with items. It was just an empty room, nothing more.
“Why are we here…?”
As I was about to ask why he brought me here, a bustling noise came from outside.
Turning around, I saw servants slowly entering through the open door. And they were carrying all sorts of clothing.
It wasn’t just one or two. At least ten servants seemed to be carrying two or three outfits each.
“Upon examining the clothes you brought from Liaoning, most of them appeared to be made of fur and leather. I’m not sure if you intentionally prepared such clothes or if the season in Liaoning is cooler than here, but they seem somewhat unsuitable for wearing here.”
While quietly observing the clothes, Hyuk Dojin approached and spoke. As I turned my head toward him, Hyuk Dojin made a meaningful expression and gestured toward the clothes.
“These are clothes made of linen and Western silk. The outfit you’re currently wearing is also of good quality, but it’s a bit too thick for summer, isn’t it? So I requested some to be made separately.”
“Is that… so?”
“It might be too much to try on all of them, so perhaps you could try one or two outfits.”
With a wave of Hyuk Dojin’s hand, a nearby servant approached and bowed. She unfolded the clothes in her hands, as if waited for me to choose.
“Pick whichever you like. Although they’re all Sowol’s clothes, you should still choose one you like since you’ll be trying them on.”
They’re all mine…
After examining the clothes, I turned my gaze toward Hyuk Dojin. He was smiling.
So this was why he asked me to spare some time. As Hyuk Dojin said, the clothes I brought from Liaoning were too thick to wear in summer, so they had been stored separately.
However, that didn’t mean I needed new clothes…
I redirected my gaze and pointed with my hand to the clothes made of black fabric that caught my eye the most. The maid who was holding the clothes handed the remaining clothes to another maid, then led me to a small room next door.
Inside the room, there was a large full-length mirror hanging on the wall. As soon as I entered, I flinched at the sight of my reflection.
A thin, slender body. And hair that flowed down in pure white.
It was a very different appearance from the people commonly seen around.
“I will assist you, Miss.”
I nodded at the maid’s words.
Accepting her help, I slowly put on the clothes. Wearing the black fabric outfit, I felt a bit cooler and more comfortable.
The feel of the fabric against my skin wasn’t bad either. Even though the clothes Joo Hwarin had provided weren’t bad, there was a clear difference. They must not have been inexpensive.
I turned my head and examined my reflection in the mirror.
The white and black colors contrasted against each other. It didn’t cling tightly, so it wasn’t uncomfortable. And the gold embroidery across the entire outfit removed any overall plainness.
“How is it? Are you uncomfortable?”
I shook my head lightly at the maid’s question.
No, it’s comfortable. I had the thought that it fit comfortably on my body, even though I didn’t know how they knew my measurements.
However, the more it fit well, the more I felt this outfit was unnecessary for me.
Biting my lip as I examined my reflected appearance, the consideration Hyuk Dojin had shown me up until now was already enough.
The dozens of outfits he had gifted me were more than I could wear over this summer alone. And after this summer passes, those clothes will be left without an owner.
So for me, having that many outfits was meaningless.
Day by day, I only hoped this peaceful time would not be broken. Every day savoring the food Geum Baekcheon made, getting up from bed and spending quiet time.
And before going to sleep, having conversations with Hyuk Dojin and then falling asleep was enough satisfaction for me.
“Miss?”
Turning my head, the maid was looking at me with a puzzled expression. Was she telling me to hurry out and show him?
I strongly felt that I didn’t know how to react. Although I felt I should express gratitude, my voice was stuck in my throat.
‘I am deceiving you, Hyuk Dojin.’
I was being selfish. Based on my own judgment, I was deceiving him and accepting his consideration and kindness without speaking the truth.
I thought I could speak it at any time as time passed.
That this winter would be my last. So he didn’t need to show any deeper kindness after that.
“Is the outfit okay?”
Pulled out of my reverie by the voice piercing my ears, I turned my body. As I opened the door and stepped out, Hyuk Dojin, who had been leaning against the wall, looked at me and opened his eyes wide.
Calmly straightening my clothes, I approached him. Hyuk Dojin stared at me intently, then slowly opened his mouth as I stopped three steps away.
“I thought a fairy had descended from the mountains.”
“Am I a fairy or a snow lady?”
At my retort, he chuckled and nodded his head. At his smile, the corners of my mouth slowly curled up as well.
I should have told him. It would become difficult if I delayed any longer.
“You are more beautiful than a snow lady, Sowol.”
But at his smile more beautiful than anyone else’s, I couldn’t voice any words.
My mind kept repeating that I shouldn’t do this, but my heart rejected that voice.
‘Just a bit longer… just a little bit.’
With only half a year left, I wanted to be selfish for just a little while longer. Just a tiny bit.
In my life where I had to live suppressed without any greed, if there was one thing I wanted, it was to enjoy this time a little longer.
I was deceiving Hyuk Dojin. Even if it was said to be wicked, it didn’t matter. Even if I was thought of as a bad woman, it didn’t matter too.
I didn’t know with what thoughts he was showing this to me, but I just liked Hyuk Dojin’s current appearance. I wanted to see that appearance a little longer.
“Thank you for the clothes.”
Even if I was a precarious snow lady standing on the surface of the lake, I wanted to be with him a little longer.