In a haze, as if intoxicated by something, I let out a painful groan. It felt as though someone was choking me, making it hard to breathe. I flailed my arms, clawing at my throat as I struggled in anguish and terror, feeling suffocated.
At that moment, a voice echoed in my mind.
[Are you suffering?]
I inwardly cried out in response to the voice, admitting my pain. Please, help me.
[Living is always a continuous suffering, isn’t it? Ah, how you’ve suffered. I will help you forget everything.]
With that voice, the echo continued.
[Forget your suffering, your sorrow, your pain, your anxiety, your anguish, your frustration, this terrible reality, and even yourself.]
A sound escaped my mouth. It wasn’t a sound of distress but a reflex to what flooded in suddenly.
[I will make you feel good.]
Such overwhelming pleasure surged through me that it felt as if it had been forcefully implanted in my mind. With that sensation, a moan slipped out again, uncontrollably shaking my body.
[So forget everything.]
I didn’t understand this at all. This was a feeling unfamiliar to me. Heat filled my body, intense and overwhelming, strong enough to feel painful if I wasn’t careful. Yet, all I could think was that it felt good.
[Get completely filled with this good feeling, and forget everything.]
My mind boiled over. My whole body was ablaze, my reason melting away, intertwining, mixing, becoming a dough-like state.
[You’ll become my toy, only obeying my words.]
So overwhelming was it that I couldn’t even remember when I had last suffered. I forgot who I was, only feeling the thought of pleasure.
[I’ll make sure you feel this good for your entire life, so call me Master.]
Upon hearing the promise of eternal pleasure, I instinctively thought of calling him “Master,” when—
[Where do you think you’re messing around?]
A spark ignited.
[Aha, what a shame.]
As I opened my eyes, weak sunlight filtered through the window. Had I really been out like this for a week? I should feel refreshed after waking up from such a long sleep, yet I felt inexplicably uneasy.
By the way, I felt like I had a dream last night. I didn’t remember the details, but it certainly felt like it was something erotic.
I couldn’t help but be puzzled; why did I often forget the specifics of these dreams upon waking?
While stretching and feeling an odd sense of regret, I caught sight of the clothes I was wearing.
It was a pajama set covered with frills. It was one of the outfits Sylvia had bought as a set for a pajama party, which had been tucked away in my wardrobe, never worn.
…Why on earth am I wearing this?
As that question arose, my mind wandered back to what had happened last night:
“Say you’ll trust me.”
“…Okay, I’ll trust you.”
The moment the memory returned, I unconsciously covered my face with my palm and sighed.
Goodness, what did I get myself into…
Taking a deep breath to calm down, I glanced around the room that I had recklessly turned into a mess yesterday. Surprisingly, it was neatly organized.
It was obvious who had done the tidying up. They say for every messy person, there’s someone who cleans up after them. I felt like I should apologize to Yoon Si-woo, or rather, thank him.
He’s helped me in so many ways. I felt overwhelmed with how to repay all of this.
After letting out a deep sigh, I stepped outside my room, where I spotted Yoon Si-woo sitting at the dining table. He looked up and widened his eyes slightly before asking about my well-being.
“Scarlet, are you feeling any better?”
“…Yeah, well. Thanks to you.”
It felt a bit hard to look him directly in the face, given that we had done something so outrageous yesterday. But considering the incident had been so significant, I turned my gaze away and responded; he seemed worried and asked again for confirmation.
“A-are you really okay?”
“…I’m fine. It won’t happen again.”
“…Really? That’s a relief.”
To reassure him, I met his gaze and offered a slight smile, which seemed to ease his worries as he sighed in relief.
Feeling a pang of guilt rising within me, I was about to express my gratitude when I noticed the breakfast laid out on the table.
There were two sets of cutlery, meaning Yoon Si-woo had prepared food for me as well.
“You set up my place too?”
“I thought you might wake up. You didn’t eat dinner last night, remember? Seems I was right to prepare it.”
His gentle smile only intensified my sense of guilt. Hadn’t I assured him I would handle all the cooking and cleaning when I moved in here?
Yet here I was, feeling like a scoundrel who had once dumped everything onto him, especially since it had been quite a while since I’d eaten properly.
Because of that mixed background, I hesitated to sit, noticing the worried look on Yoon Si-woo’s face as he spoke.
“Uh, is this because of your diet? No matter what, don’t skip meals. It’s bad for your health.”
“It’s not like that…”
I shook my head and finally sat down.
After all, he put in the effort. Out of respect for that, I should eat.
With that thought, I brought some food to my mouth.
“……”
“…Why the long face? Is it not to your taste?”
“…No, it’s just, it tastes normal.”
It was, as I said, plain yet delicious.
I had barely any appetite recently, so I wondered why all of a sudden it was different.
Then I remembered I had kept myself up all night eating lemon candy and then had a long sleep.
Moreover, perhaps due to yesterday’s incident, I felt psychologically grounded as well.
It seems that led to my appetite returning.
Feeling a bit embarrassed that relying on Yoon Si-woo had such an effect on me, I quickly finished my meal.
After that, I contemplated whether to sneak back to my room but ended up sitting down once more.
Then, I turned to Yoon Si-woo and spoke.
“Hey, Yoon Si-woo.”
“Yeah? What is it?”
“Well, um… thank you.”
Instead of an apology, I wanted to express my gratitude. It was essential to communicate this to him.
“Thank you for cleaning my room yesterday.”
“…It’s fine. I couldn’t leave you to sleep in such a mess.”
“Thanks for preparing breakfast too.”
“…It’s nothing special.”
As I expressed my thanks, Yoon Si-woo’s face flushed a bit with shyness.
Seeing him like that made me continue.
“About changing my clothes that were stained with blood and washing them, that was you too, right?”
“Ugh… Well, I couldn’t just let you stay like that… I, I did it with my eyes closed!”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m just thankful.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle at Yoon Si-woo’s flustered expression as I slowly spoke.
Then I continued.
“The times you saved me when I was kidnapped, the times you helped me in embarrassing situations. All the times you agreed to my difficult requests, and the times you called me a friend. Even yesterday, when you said you’d rush over whenever something went wrong and reassured me to trust you.”
I recalled all the moments I had been grateful for.
One by one, I brought to light the feelings I had stashed away in my heart, speaking earnestly.
“Thank you. Truly.”
As I spoke those words of appreciation, Yoon Si-woo replied with a somewhat awkward smile, “…You don’t have to thank me so much. We’re friends, right?”
I gazed at him for a moment before a surge of impulse lifted me from my seat.
I walked toward the kitchen and grabbed a knife, gently grazing it across the back of my hand.
“Scarlet, what are you—!”
“Just a second.”
Startled by my sudden action, Yoon Si-woo looked at me in shock as I extended my palm towards him.
The moment the pain in my hand faded away, I saw him intake a slight breath.
“Ever since I was kidnapped by that witch, I’ve turned into this. I’ve become something that struggles to be called a person… a monster. Now I really don’t know when I will no longer be me.”
I spoke with a pained smile, wishing to be honest with no one other than him.
Then I asked,
“But still, you…”
Regardless of how things turned out, I planned to accept it.
With a glimmer of hope, I pleaded,
“Will you still be my friend?”
“Scarlet.”
Interrupting my thoughts, Yoon Si-woo firmly stated, looking at my inherently monstrous form, the one that blatantly didn’t look like a human.
“No matter what you are, I’ll always be your friend.”
I thought ruefully at his reply.
Ah, I knew it was true.
You are the only one in this world who can truly accept me as I am.
So as long as you’re by my side, if you truly understand my secrets and (that you) see me as a friend,
I can find happiness.
Thus, I said sincerely,
“Thank you. Yoon Si-woo.”
I smiled genuinely and spoke those words.
“Okay, I’ll be off.”
“Yeah, take care.”
I waved cheerfully as I saw Yoon Si-woo off to work, back to his shifts as the holiday ended.
Even without Yoon Si-woo by my side, I no longer felt anxiety like before.
If I were to run into troubles, he had promised to rush back.
I chose to place my trust in his words, knowing he would come for me, unlike others.
With a bit of brightness in my heart, I returned to my room.
Maybe I’d sleep a bit more to catch up on the rest I’d missed.
While pondering, I noticed a shopping bag lying collapsed in the room.
It contained the cosmetics I had received as a gift from Florene.
I wondered if I brushed past it when I was being reckless yesterday, so I checked inside.
“Ugh…”
Everything was neatly sealed, with the contents of the cosmetics completely vanished, as if they had evaporated.
Did they spill somehow?
If they had spilled, there should have been traces left in the bag, but instead, I found nothing, which left me momentarily puzzled.
“…Yoon Si-woo must’ve cleaned it up properly.”
With Yoon Si-woo’s cleaning skills removing the bloodstains from the wall without a trace, it seemed plausible this was the same case. I tossed the bag and the empty cosmetic containers into the trash without suspicion.
Actually, more than that, I was just regretting how I lost the products.
“Considering they were expensive, I thought I could sell them and buy something delicious later…”
Muttering those words, I lay back down on the bed and drifted off to sleep once more.