If you Don’t Love Me, I Will Die
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Chapter 4 Table of contents

Ania thought Edward had completely forgotten.
The memories of that time.
The feelings they had shared.

She wondered if she was the only one who remembered and felt saddened by it.

‘I swear I will love you and you alone forever.’

That’s what he said.
He had sworn to love her forever.

Since their separation, he hadn’t visited her once.
Had he grown tired of her? Did he hate her?

“It’s time to wake up, young lady.”
“……”
“Miss?”
“……”
“Miss!”
“Mmm…”

Ania woke up from her short sleep to the sight of the maid shaking her awake.

“Miss, you need to eat.”

But she didn’t recognize the room.

“Where am I?”
“Your mansion, my lady.”
“My house?”
“No, your mansion.”

Scrambling to her feet, Ania smoothed her disheveled hair and nodded.

Her mind was still foggy from the dream she’d had the night before, but she remembered the events of a few days ago.

‘That’s right. I’m married.’

She rubbed her eyes, looking around the slightly different room.

“You should eat.”
“Yes. I’ll head down.”
“I’ll have something prepared for you.”
“Okay.”

Ania rolled out of bed and stumbled to her dressing table.
She lightly smoothed her hair, washed her face with the water she’d been given, and touched up her makeup.

She was beautiful without anything on her face, but with makeup on, she looked even better.

Ania looked at her face with satisfaction and smiled.

“Marriage…”

It had been a half-hearted marriage.

Edward hadn’t been interested in her, and he didn’t seem too keen on the idea of marriage.

“No wonder.”

He didn’t want to marry her; he’d been sold.
Edward’s face was somber all the way down the aisle.

“I wonder if he didn’t want to marry me…”

Edward’s face wouldn’t leave her mind.
And then she felt depressed.

After all, she thought, if she married him, he would look back at her.
But Edward remained serious.

Ania regretted it all the way down the aisle.

‘I shouldn’t have asked him to marry me so casually.’

What if he dislikes me?
What if he doesn’t look at me after we’re married?
What if he hates me forever?

But it was then.

‘A goldenglow.’

Edward’s words startled Ania.

It wasn’t a name one would recognize unless they were interested in plants.

‘Do you know this flower?’
‘I know. You used to love this flower.’

Ania’s heart leaped when she heard those words.
He remembered.

You haven’t forgotten me.
You remembered my favorite flower, even after all these years.

If you haven’t forgotten that, I can make you look at me again.
I can make you love me again.

“Good.”

Ania finished her makeup with satisfaction and headed for the dining room.

***

“Come on, let’s eat.”
“…”
“Aah~.”
“Whew…”

It’s been about two weeks since we got married.

Ania was still trying to seduce me.
First, she would bring food directly into my mouth like this every mealtime.

“Do you like it?”
“It’s delicious.”
“Hoo-hoo, I’m glad you like it.”

Ania would use her tiny hands to pick up bits and pieces of food and put them in my mouth.

‘But if you think I’m going to fall with this, you’re wrong.’

Of course, I ate everything she gave me.
Inwardly, I wondered if she would do the same for the next meal.

But that’s not the same as a crush.
It’s more like how you feel about a 2D girlfriend beyond the monitor.
You love her when you see her, but you move on when the screen goes off.
Ania Brontë is nothing more than a fleeting tickle.

Once I hypnotized myself, it became easier to maintain my expression.
But my body still felt stiff.

Anyway…

I finished my meal and stood up.

“That was a good meal.”
“Mr. Edward.”

I was about to return to my room to practice my swordsmanship when Ania called out to me.

“What’s the matter?”
“I was wondering if you could join me today if you’re not too busy?”
“I’m busy today.”
“I meant to ask you to make time.”
“…I’m sorry, but I’ll be busy.”
“You’re just going to practice your swordsmanship again.”
“Practicing swordsmanship is important. You don’t realize it, Ania, but if I skip a day of practice, it shows.”
“It’s quite like marriage then; if you miss a day, you’ll be estranged.”
“……”

There was something hidden in Ania’s words.
It wasn’t malicious, but there was more than she was letting on.

So, if I interpreted her words as, “If you don’t give me some time right now, I’m going to divorce you,” it becomes a terrific threat!

Now, what should one do if threatened?

Let them know that you won’t back down either. You don’t negotiate with terrorists! (TN: Bruh)

“Then do you have time tomorrow?”
“I have sword practice tomorrow.”

Her cheeks puff up as I speak, and she leaps to her feet, strutting over to me.

She looks up at me with a pouty expression on her face.

“Can you spare a minute today?”

As she spoke, Ania… wrapped herself in my arms.

I could smell her floral scent, the sound of her heartbeat, and feel her breasts.

“Can’t you?”

She looked up at me with a gaunt face as she said that.

So, now you may be wondering what to do.

“…Sure.”

I gave in.

***

“Is this where you wanted to go?”

After a long carriage ride, we arrived at the capital of the Empire, Khaledvar.

The sun had risen high in the sky, and many young people were in the streets.

“I’ve always wanted to go here with you.”
“I thought it was something important.”

I retorted, and Ania poked me in the side with her elbow.

“Are you saying we can’t go out together if it’s unimportant?”
“I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Then let’s go.”

Ania slipped her arm through mine.
We strolled through the plaza of Khaledvar.

The ground was paved with stone, and a fountain adorned the square, giving it life.

A pigeon or some other bird fluttered through the air, and the sun shone brightly, creating a small rainbow in the sky.

And… quite a few couples are showing their affection for each other.

By 21st-century standards, it was normal, but by the eyes of this world, it was quite saucy.

Whether she realized it or not, Ania slowly walked among the lovers.

“That’s quite brave of them.”
“All lovers do that these days.”
“God would be angry.”
“Didn’t he say that we should all love one another?”

I don’t bother to reply.

By the way, walking and talking like this, Ania, the duke’s only daughter, seemed like an ordinary woman.

No, no, no.

Ania Brontë is a wicked woman.
A wicked woman who has seduced and killed countless men.

Don’t be fooled by this appearance.

As I pull myself together and look around, I can feel people’s eyes on me.
No… they were looking at the person at my side.

Especially the men.
Even with a woman next to them, they couldn’t help but stare.

It’s a strange sight when you think about it.
Walking around the capital with such a beautiful woman by your side.

They’re only envious because they don’t know better.

“Mr. Edward, come here.”

Ania, who had already untangled her arms from my grasp, called out to me.
I followed her out of the square and into an alleyway leading to a colorful street.

Shops were decorated with colorful decorations, and clothes were displayed through the glass windows.

They were casual wear.

“Clothes?”
“Come in.”

Ania walked excitedly down the street and stepped into a shop.
I followed her in, and she was looking at the clothes with a twinkle in her eye.

“Does it fit?”

She picks up a dress and drapes it over her body.

“What do you think?”
“It looks good.”
“And this one?”
“That too.”

Ania entered the dressing room and posed in this, that, and whatever else.
They all looked good on her. It wasn’t the clothes that were the problem.
If she picked up a rag off the street and put it on, it would look good.

“Which one looks the best on me?”
“Everything.”
“At least try to care.”

Ania huffed and ducked into the dressing room, carrying a flimsy white dress, and then emerged wearing it.

“What do you think?”

Of course, it looks good.

“It looks good on you.”

No one else would look better.
There wasn’t an ounce of falsehood in my answer.

“Really… I’m just asking which one looks best.”
“They all look good on you. Promise.”
“……”

Ania’s face suddenly turned sour, and she began hanging up the clothes she’d picked out.

Even though I said they looked good on her… what was wrong with her?

“Let’s go, I’ll stop by another store.”
“Wait.”

While questioning why she didn’t buy anything, an even bigger desire gripped my heart.

I picked up the clothes she’d put back and headed for the counter.

“You can keep the change.”

I put five gold coins on the counter and grabbed the clothes.
She stood there, frozen in place, staring at me blankly.

“Now that I think about it, I didn’t give you anything for our wedding.”

It was a spur-of-the-moment act, but now that I’ve come to my senses, I feel incredibly embarrassed.

I told her she looked good in different clothes and bought them.

“Let’s take a look at some of the other shops.”

I leave Ania, still speechless, and head out of the store.
My face felt hot.
Maybe even red.

But just as I was thinking that…
I caught sight of a familiar face.
And they were looking at me, too.

“Brother. It’s been a long time.”
“John…”

It was Edward Radner’s half-brother… Johann Radner.

Translator’s Corner

I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Since I’m copying what I have in my drafts, I can’t remember all the name changes or how some people reference others. If you find any inconsistencies, comment them below.

-Ruminas

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