If you Don’t Love Me, I Will Die
Chapter 6 Table of contents

“What did you just say?”
“Please kiss me.”

Ania tapped her fair and soft cheek, closing her eyes. It had a slightly rosy tint.

Just looking at that blushing cheek made my heart swell, and it felt like I had turned into a young boy.

So, I responded nonchalantly, “It’s unseemly to kiss so openly.”

Feeling a bit embarrassed, I lowered my head, but Ania’s expression began to darken again.

“But we are married, so it’s perfectly normal.”

I tried to find another subject.

At that moment, Ania playfully smiled again and tapped her cheek with her index finger.

“Hurry up.”
“I’ll do it when we get back.”
“What difference does it make?”

It does make a difference.

Being fed by Ania Brontë already elicited unwarranted reactions. If I were to even kiss her cheek, I would forever live with that moment ingrained in my memory.

In that case, someday, like those men who go crazy for love, I would step forward for Ania, even if my life were at risk.

‘Spending the whole day thinking about you is a waste.’

Ania Brontë.

Though we had merely exchanged glances, this woman had made her way into my heart, causing it to pound.

A woman whose beauty alone could captivate nobles, knights, and warriors at will.

Therefore, I felt both endearment and fear towards Ania Bronte.

Then, Ania, with a playful smile, asked, “Are you perhaps embarrassed?”
Smiling brightly, she continued, “I guess it is.”
“No one is watching. If my husband and I keep our mouths shut, no one will ever know.”

Her expression suddenly changed as Ania leaned in, bringing her face close to mine.

She hid her smile and murmured, “Or maybe you have no interest in me at all.”
“…”

What should I say in response? There were too many traps set.

I couldn’t figure out what to say because I did care.

So, I kept my mouth shut and didn’t respond.

However, Ania seemed to interpret my silence in her own way. She pressed her cheek against mine and smiled faintly.

“I understand.”

Ania spoke with a bitter smile, and from then until we arrived at the mansion, she simply gazed at the setting sun.

Perhaps I hurt her feelings.

‘But it’s because of you…’

Ania Brontë, you’re a woman who doesn’t know what love is.
You value having me in your hands more than uttering the words, “I love you.”

So why do you wear such a lonely expression?

I bit my lower lip with a complicated emotion that I couldn’t name until we arrived at the mansion.

***

Upon returning to the mansion, Ania returned to her room, refused to eat, and threw herself onto the bed.

Burying her face in the soft pillow, she let out a sigh.

Although the clothes Edward gave her were already scattered on the foot of the wardrobe, Ania didn’t pay them any mind.

‘Why was I so pleased with those clothes?’

Feeling foolish for getting excited alone, swelling with joy alone, Ania’s heart inexplicably turned sad.

‘Irritating.’

Edward Radner was a person she couldn’t understand.

There was a time when she thought her feelings had returned when he handed her all the clothes she had tried on, claiming they looked good on her.

Even though he complained about the need to come to the capital, she was relieved he was enjoying himself because he looked at her with a gentle smile.

But no.

His expression suddenly hardened, as if going out with her was not fun, and he didn’t even give me a kiss on the carriage ride back.

‘I didn’t even want an actual kiss.’
It was simply a request for a peck on the cheek.

Isn’t that kind of small skinship between a couple such a big deal?

Of course, she knew Edward went to church weekly to worship God.
She also knew he was an upright man living according to the church’s doctrines.

Because I liked that about him.

Ania was less of a devout believer than Edward.
However, she knew no doctrine prohibits affection between husband and wife.

That fact hurt Ania’s heart and also her pride.

Other men fall in love just by her looking at them and smiling.
Winning a man’s heart wasn’t that difficult for Ania Brontë.

If she had to name the easiest thing to do in the world, she would confidently say it would be winning a man’s heart.

However, the men who gained her heart were all boring.

They longed for Ania’s love and begged for her affection by bringing things she did not ask for.

Some would say, ‘I would even sacrifice my life for you.’

Ania let out a helpless laugh.

“When did I tell you to sacrifice your life?”

And they actually gave their lives.
If they go to fight a dragon for its heart, they’ll get eaten, right?
He won’t make a contract with the devil to gain power over the Empire for me, right?
Surely he would die if he jumped off the castle’s walls…

Ania felt burdened by their excessive affection.
There can be too much love.

Ania could not understand their feelings.
Men who sacrifice their lives for women who do not give them affection.

But now she is doing it herself.
She wanted Edward’s love.

Although it was ridiculously funny to Ania, she felt depressed.

***

Ania was upset.

I might not be an expert on women’s emotions, but even someone unfamiliar with her would clearly see that she was upset.

“My Lady, how about having dinner together tonight…”
“No.”

“Ania, I bought a beautiful necklace as a gift a few days ago, and I thought it would suit you…”
“It’s fine.”

“The goldenglow bloomed beautifully. Shall we take a stroll in the garden together?”
“I’m not in the mood.”

She was definitely upset.

No matter what suggestion I made, she rejected it. For an entire week!

Her feeding me or suggesting a sudden outing wasn’t as scary as this.

It was much better back then.

Dealing with her occasional advances was fine, but I couldn’t do much when she blatantly avoided me like this.

“This is a big problem.”

I became worried. What if Ania decides to divorce me? How would I handle that situation?

If that happened, the social circles would be in an uproar, and William Radner’s dreadful situation would be evident without even having to imagine it. In that case, I would die. Not just socially, but literally.

Either at the hands of Valentine Brontë or getting thrown out onto the streets to starve.

I had to make up with her somehow, so I went to Ania’s room and knocked on the door, suggesting we talk.

“I don’t have anything to talk about. Especially not with Edward, who won’t even kiss my cheek!” she said, making it clear that she was upset.

So, for a whole week, I desperately racked my brain. How could I mend the heart of an upset girl?

And then, I came up with the first plan.

‘Women are weak to compliments.’

I woke up early and lingered near Ania’s room. After about 30 minutes of pacing, Ania opened the door and stepped out. I rushed towards her and started a conversation.

“My Lady… you look gorgeous again today!”

Of course, it was morning, so her hair was messy, her face slightly puffy, and she hadn’t put on makeup, making her complexion a bit pale… but she was still beautiful.

It wasn’t a lie.

“…”

However, Ania slammed the door shut and went inside.

“Then, what on earth… what should I do to make your heart feel better?”

I went into contemplation for another two days,

I revisited the dramas, movies, and romance novels I had seen before my possession, pondering how women resolved their grievances.

Amidst this contemplation, a brilliant idea struck me.

Introducing the ‘Sugar Infusion Operation.’

A dating expert once said, “No woman in the world dislikes sweet things.”

“Lorendel!”
“Yes, My Lord!”
“Fetch the best pastry chef in the Empire right now! Immediately!”
“Leave it to me!”

Thus, Lorendel brought five renowned pastry chefs from the Empire the next day.

“They must be made the most delicious in the world!”

After instructing them, five delectable desserts appeared: cake, macarons, cookies, and more.

I immediately carried the tray and headed to Ania’s room.

“My Lady! My Lady!”
“…”

Anya, sulking as if advertising it, furrowed her brow and pressed her face into a pillow.

“Why, Mr. Edward.”
“Lately, you seem down, so I brought some excellent desserts… Would you like to have some?”
“…”

Anya lowered the corners of her mouth.

“Um… I dislike sweet things, My Lord.”

Ah…
There are women in the world who dislike sweets.
Once again, I realized that love is not something you learn from books.

‘Another failure.’

I expected the door to slam shut again this time.
Thinking so, I tightly closed my eyes.

‘Huh…?’

However, contrary to my expectations, the door remained open.
Yet, Ania disappeared.
It’s not like people suddenly shoot up to the sky or sink into the ground.

“Ah… My Lady!”

I realized the reason when one of the maids let out a startled scream.
Lowering my gaze, there was Ania,
Collapsed on the floor.

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