Xiao Shan nearly drowned the time he fell into the water, becoming seriously ill with a high fever and had a persistent cough. He almost didn't make it.
Fortunately, he eventually woke up.
After waking up, Xiao Shan couldn't remember what happened before he fell into the water. However, based on what others told him, it seemed that he was mischievous and playful by nature, deliberately avoiding the palace attendants who followed him, wanting to play games like hide-and-seek with them, which led to him accidentally falling into the water.
But he remembered the feeling of being on the brink of death in the water, and he also remembered the joy of being able to breathe again after being rescued. He recalled the sensation of struggling and sinking into the water, and the distant sound of Xiao Jin calling for someone to save him.
He couldn't remember the appearance of the person who pulled him out of the water, but he did remember that the person was very tall and had strong wrists.
Once he fully recovered, he asked about his rescuer. The Emperor told him that the person who saved him was an external official. The place where he fell into the water was where the palace concubines resided. According to the rules, external officials could not enter the inner palace without an imperial edict. However, the official happened to hear the cries for help and, in his eagerness to save someone, didn't consider the rules.
Entering the inner palace without an edict was a crime, but saving a prince was a merit.
Now that the merits and demerits balanced out, it was best not to mention the matter further. After all, bringing it up too often wouldn't be good for that external official.
After hearing the Emperor's words, Xiao Shan didn't inquire further.
After the near-drowning incident, Xiao Shan was most grateful to two people: one was Xiao Jin, who happened to pass by and heard someone fall into the water, rushing over to try to save him; the other was the official whose name he didn't even know.
After waking up, he became somewhat strange.
There were many things he couldn't remember, and many things he could. For example, he remembered the people around him—the Emperor, Consort Lan, Xiao Jin, and others. But at the same time, his mind was vaguely filled with other things.
He couldn't clearly articulate what those things were; it was as if they were shrouded in a layer of mist, making everything feel hazy and indistinct.
Therefore, he always wanted to peel away the layer of mist in his mind to see clearly what was hidden inside. To be honest, he was very curious. But to others, it seemed like he was staring blankly with vacant eyes, often remaining motionless for hours.
His eyes were wide open, and at a glance, it was quite frightening.
He felt that his mind had matured significantly, and he even personally went to a temple to light an eternal flame lamp for his former self.
The Emperor and Consort Lan thought he was lighting a lamp for blessings and had no idea it was an eternal flame lamp.
But since Xiao Shan had already lit it, they let him be.
Rumors slowly spread in the palace that he became a fool, and Consort Lan often cried in front of the Emperor because of it.
She cried about Xiao Shan's misfortune and her own misery.
Naturally, the Emperor was also very concerned about Xiao Shan's health. The imperial physicians of the Imperial Medical Institute were once again gathered to diagnose and treat Xiao Shan.
The physicians later concluded that he was frightened by the near-drowning incident and had not yet fully recovered. They recommended that he interact more with people. As for his recovery, the physicians couldn't guarantee to what extent he would improve.
They could only do their best to treat him.
Xiao Rong once said in front of him that foolishness could be contagious and that everyone should stay away from him to avoid becoming foolish as well.
Xiao Jin argued with Xiao Rong because of this. At that time, Xiao Jin was not yet the crown prince, but he was very fierce towards Xiao Rong, almost wanting to fight him. Xiao Jin even remembered the Emperor and the imperial physicians' words and often came to play with Xiao Shan, hoping to help him return to normal.
Xiao Shan didn't want to play those childish games with Xiao Jin at all, such as hiding an object to see who could find it first or guessing which hand held a chess piece.
To Xiao Shan, these games were too simple and boring, like someone repeatedly asking him one plus one equals what.
Xiao Jin, however, was very afraid that Xiao Shan would really become foolish and secretly cried in a corner several times because of it.
Later, Xiao Shan realized he couldn't go on like this. If he didn't start acting normal, he would have to drink bitter medicine three times a day, face the tearful expressions of Consort Lan and Xiao Jin, and endure the various looks from people who didn't see him as normal. So, he quickly became 'normal' again.
After all, the medicine was too bitter and hard to swallow, and the crying was too irritating.
However, he was not very forgiving, so he would complain to the Emperor about those who offended him.
Life was already so dull; he couldn't let it become even more boring.
Fortunately, as he grew older, the thin veil covering his mind gradually became more transparent.
Then one day, everything became clear to him. The year he fell into the water, he gained an extra layer of memory compared to Xiao Jin and the others.
He didn't know if it was because he came here after Xiao Shan drowned, or if he drank less of Meng Po's soup* and regained his past life's memories after falling into the water. Because whether it was his past life or the present, what he felt was real.
*According to legend, Meng Po is an old woman who serves a special soup to souls before they are reincarnated. This soup causes them to forget their past lives, ensuring that they enter their new lives without memories of their previous ones. The idea is to allow souls to start fresh without the burdens or attachments of their past experiences.
Two completely distinct sets of real memories.
With his memories clear, Xiao Shan didn't dwell too much on it.
The past life was over, and fortunately, he had no lingering attachments. Overthinking was pointless; living well in the present was what he should focus on.
Being born as a prince, he naturally wanted to live a fulfilling life.
As for marriage, Xiao Shan never considered it. The candidates favored by Consort Lan were all too young, and he felt it would be a crime to pursue them.
Until one day, the truth came out that General Xie Chen of the Northern Frontier was actually a ger, Xie Zhui, who hid his identity.
On one hand, Xiao Shan felt that such a person was worthy of admiration. On the other hand, he suddenly remembered that during the days when he was drifting between life and death after falling into the water, he overheard the Emperor and Consort Lan mentioning that the person who saved him was a general with the surname Xie.
There were not many generals with the surname Xie in the court, and there happened to be one that year named Xie Sui. Later, General Xie took his family to the border and never returned to the capital.
These memories were originally vague and had not been recalled. Later, due to the rumors of him being a fool in his childhood, the Emperor forbade anyone from mentioning those years in front of him. As his memories gradually layered with age, many memories intersected, and he never thought of those conversations during his dazed state.
However, when the matter of Xie Zhui was being hotly debated, with the court arguing whether Xie Zhui was meritorious or guilty, the news reached Xiao Shan's ears. At that moment, he suddenly remembered the long-forgotten past.
Recalling these events, he privately investigated and learned about Xie Zhui's character. Knowing what kind of person Xie Zhui was, he could determine the best way to help him.
The investigation revealed that Xie Zhui was a resilient person. He wouldn't commit heinous acts, had a rather cold but not capricious personality, and had a clear and intelligent view of things. He was a smart person.
Xiao Shan didn't say anything after reviewing the results.
At that time, the Emperor was losing hair* over how to deal with Xie Zhui. He couldn't reward him, couldn't kill him, and couldn't just leave him alone.
*a Chinese idiom; describe someone who is deeply troubled or anxious to the point of losing their hair
The court was in an uproar, and the Emperor was deeply conflicted.
Rumors were rampant, almost to the point of driving someone to death. Then someone suggested that since Xie Zhui had merits, they could build a temple for him and have him pray for the country inside. Of course, the premise of this suggestion was that Xie Zhui would voluntarily propose it. This way, it would not only resolve the court's disputes but also save Xie Zhui's life, providing an explanation to the people.
Xiao Shan scoffed at this suggestion. In his view, a hero without treasonous intentions should not be forced into obscurity, especially one who shed blood to defend the country. However, due to the constraints of the era, Xie Zhui's identity as a ger made his achievements in the military seem unconventional.
The Emperor did not agree to the suggestion, but he also did not immediately oppose it.
Xiao Shan couldn't be bothered to guess what the Emperor was contemplating.
When he met with the Emperor, he casually mentioned that while the situation was indeed difficult, it was a fact that Xie Zhui had merits. They couldn't erase his contributions just because he was a ger...
Xiao Shan's point was that while they might not reward him, they shouldn't completely block his path to survival either.
Perhaps Xiao Shan had said a bit too much at the time, because when he finally stopped talking, the Emperor suddenly asked, "I don't usually see you talk this much. Why are you so talkative today?"
Xiao Shan's expression remained unchanged as he replied, "I just feel like I've dealt with someone with the surname Xie before, but I really can't remember where, so I said a bit more."
The Emperor thoughtfully responded with an "Oh," and waved him off.
Then, within a few days, the Emperor directly issued an edict, bestowing marriage upon Xie Zhui and Xiao Shan.
Xiao Shan only intended to give Xie Zhui a helping hand; he never actually thought about marrying him. In his mind, he always assumed he would remain single for the rest of his life.
But the Emperor had other plans.
Xiao Shan had all the desires of an ordinary person, but he never liked anyone—neither men nor women.
When he heard the news of the Emperor's marriage decree, his first reaction was that it wasn't so bad; he didn't dislike Xie Zhui.
On the day of the wedding, as Xiao Shan held Xie Zhui's hand, he noticed how thin it was.
Yet, it was these very slender hands that protected his brother and countless people at the border.
At that time, Xiao Shan thought that once Xie Zhui came to his residence, he could take good care of him.
The cook at his residence was particularly skilled.
Xiao Shan told himself that someone like Xie Zhui shouldn't live under the shadow of rumors and gossip. He should be dazzling; someone others would envy and admire.
When Xiao Shan spoke of these past events, he omitted the supernatural elements and summarized it in a more concise manner. Essentially, he said that Xiao Jin had been good to him, so he reciprocated by being good to Xiao Jin.
From these words, Xie Zhui also understood why Xiao Shan had been so lenient with him from the very beginning.
So, it all had its causes and effects.
Xie Zhui felt a mix of emotions—some happiness and some indescribable sadness. He said, "If I didn't have the surname Xie..."
"My marriage to you has nothing to do with your surname being Xie. From the beginning, I was interested in you as a person," Xiao Shan said. "You should know, I'm not someone who would wrong myself. I am grateful to the person who saved me back then. But if his descendants were to act recklessly and weren't like you, then things between us wouldn't have turned out the way they did."
"But saying it like this, it seems as if our marriage was destined."
Even if Xie Zhui didn't have the surname Xie, Xiao Shan would still treat him well after marrying him.
Because of the person, not their surname.
However, past events often provide another opportunity, making certain things go more smoothly.
Xie Zhui hummed softly.
He believed Xiao Shan's words—that their being together was destined, a fated connection.
"Xie Zhui, have I ever told you that I really like you?" Xiao Shan said with a smile, holding him in his arms. Perhaps in the past, they were together not because of love, but after so many days of careful nurturing, their hearts grew closer, and their feelings deepened.
Xiao Shan always wanted to find an opportunity to tell Xie Zhui his true feelings, and today was the perfect moment.
"You've never said it," Xie Zhui replied softly, "but I can feel it." Because of Xiao Shan's words and actions in daily life, he had always been confident that he could win Xiao Shan's heart.