NoveLight ™
The reflection in the mirror wore a displeased expression. I scratched my cheek in embarrassment. With my naturally pale skin, the blush on my face was all too obvious.
“This… this doesn’t seem right.”
I was wearing a plain, light gray dress. I chose it because it seemed simple, modest, and not too revealing. However, it clung to me just enough that it accentuated my figure more than I’d anticipated.
I should have known when I heard it was a popular style for the "new city look."
The dress hugged tightly below my chest, drawing attention to my waist, then flared out to emphasize my hips and thighs, showcasing a graceful curve. Paired with my youthful face, it gave off a strange, guilty sensation.
“No. I can’t wear this.”
In the end, that dress was out. My room was now littered with clothes, yet I hadn’t progressed beyond my underwear. The irony was stifling.
Since I’d agreed to meet up, I didn’t want to look bad. It was a celebration for Gawol’s victory in the Arena, and it had been ages since I’d seen anyone. I wasn’t about to walk out looking like I’d just popped over to the corner store.
But maybe because I usually wore baggy clothes, or perhaps because it had just been so long since I looked in a mirror, all my confidence evaporated the moment I tried on an outfit.
My only refuge at times like these was the internet. Yet, even after searching, nothing felt right.
[Recent Search History]
…
After more than two hours of battling with my wardrobe, all I had left was a room in chaos and a wrecked search algorithm.
This is dangerous.
Now, I’m seeing clothing ads everywhere. Even on video platforms, where it’s usually just gaming content, new channels I’ve never seen are popping up. I could understand the fashion ads, but why were there makeup ads now too?
No matter what, I’m not putting on makeup. That’s the last shred of my pride as a guy.
Scrolling down, I saw a recommended video titled, “If You’re the Girl Who Made Someone’s Heart Flutter for the First Time…” What is this? With an angry click, I gave it a thumbs-down, marked it as “Not Interested,” and blocked the channel. A full three-piece combo to rid my sight of that video.
I almost threw my phone in frustration but held back, remembering how expensive it was.
“Maybe I should just sleep.”
Originally, I’d planned to wear something I’d bought myself from a shopping mall. After all, I’d bought those clothes because I liked them. I wouldn’t have bought them if I hadn’t intended to wear them.
But once I had other clothes in front of me, I got greedy. Since they were gifts, I thought I should at least try them on. If I found something prettier and more appealing, I’d wear that.
It wasn’t a flawed idea. But as soon as I noticed how much my body showed in the mirror, everything started to feel wrong. It was my own body that was the problem.
Once, in the bathroom, I’d taken a private look between my legs. I shuddered. Smooth and seamless, with not a petal in sight. When I opened up to that soft, plump mound, I had to acknowledge the changes.
Wearing even slightly revealing clothes now gave me that same weird, unnerving feeling. Fully accepting my body was still difficult.
[Current Time: 2:43 AM]
It seemed I’d overthought things. The night had become far too late. I’d managed to narrow it down to two options: a casual suit I originally bought and a beige knit dress that Luce had given me.
At least I’d tried everything on. I’d make the final decision in the morning. When the time came, I’d probably just throw on something and go.
With a mix of unease and anticipation, I fell asleep.
[Chat with Jeong Seok-won]
I was almost at the rendezvous point by bus when a message came from my master.
I rewrote my response several times. For someone with poor communication skills, trying to say everything I wanted was just too confusing. In the end, I erased everything and just sent a thank-you message.
When I get my prize money, I should send him something. I’d been receiving so much, I felt like I owed him. I could ask his wife what he might like.
He read my message but didn’t reply. It’s a good thing, though—tough guys like us know silence is golden in awkward moments. As someone born to be a man’s man, I let it slide without adding anything more.
Luckily, the restaurant was not far from the station. Even walking slowly with crutches, I could make it without breaking a sweat. The spring weather was holding, so I wasn’t sweating either.
The streets were bustling with people. Couples who looked close, groups of laughing high schoolers, and happy families. It felt strangely familiar, and I could easily recall why.
There’s an aquarium nearby. So I’m probably right.
I must have been in second grade. That night, we had dinner at a family restaurant. There was a warmth to that gathering.
Would I ever feel that warmth again? I wanted to feel that warmth from a person, not from the sterile, chlorine-scented water. That’s why I overcame my fear and came all this way.
[Premium Korean Beef Specialty Restaurant, Mong (夢)]
“Welcome! Do you have a reservation?”
“Yes… I think it’s under the name Yuserin.”
“Please follow me. I’ll show you to your table.”
I hadn’t arrived late, but it seemed I was the last one to join. Everyone was already gathered when I stepped into the private room.
“Um… I’m here as Yuserin’s guest. Is this the right place?”
My voice came out softer than intended. But judging from the attention I got as soon as I entered, everyone must have heard me.
“Gawol? Are you really Gawol? Wow!”
“Please, have a seat here!”
Two women and two men—the same crew I knew from our party. The men were instantly recognizable, given the age gap between Sulbbang and Dolguol.
Their appearances were also as expected. The berserker player “FatherDolguolIsComing” looked like a kind, middle-aged man. He seemed like someone who’d have a couple of kids. Meanwhile, Sulbbang had a lively vibe, like a cheerful young man.
I noticed each of them glanced at my left leg. Though I shrank back unconsciously, their gazes weren’t blatant. My brace looked almost like a half-cast, so it wasn’t too noticeable.
“Oh, you must’ve had a tough time getting here. Let me take your crutch.”
“Ah… thanks.”
“Did you hurt your leg?”
“It just kind of happened. I’ll be fine as long as I’m careful.”
My seat was between the two women. Yes. The issue was these two women—Elderin and Sansae. I couldn’t tell who was who.
One of them was only slightly taller than me, maybe around 160 cm. Her outfit was decorated with frills, giving her a girlish charm. She had a smiley face that seemed to invite affection wherever she went.
The other one, however, looked well over 170 cm tall. She had a piercing in one ear and looked like someone who had a wild side. With that bright smile, she seemed like she had a friendly personality.
So it’s simple—one’s the big sister type, the other’s the younger sister type. The taller one must be Elderin, right? It didn’t match my mental image, but her friendliness made sense.
Just as I was about to thank them for the invite, the shorter one waved her hand.
“I’ve already ordered the meat. Here’s the menu—see if there’s anything else you want!”
“Oh, thanks.”
Pushed into looking at the menu, I instinctively checked the prices first. Maybe it was a habit from living frugally for so long. Even knowing I didn’t have to pay, I still felt uncomfortable with expensive food.
And when I saw the prices, my eyes widened. It was more than I’d expected! I had to stop myself from looking any further or I’d lose my appetite.
I’ll just eat whatever they ordered. Plain rice for me will do.
“Anything is fine with me.”
“Then we’ll get the flower sirloin, okay?”
“Yes…”
“By the way, you’re really cute.”
“Oh, no. I’m not cute at all.”
Still, they didn’t tell me who was who. The sisterly type was more intimidating, while the younger one seemed easier to talk to. Years of being a social outcast had left me with a certain instinctual fear.
If I think about their game characters, the smaller one should be Sansae. Sansae’s character was a small, cute halfling bard, even shorter than I was. So maybe her real-world taste isn’t that different.
“Um… you’re Sansae, right?”
“Me?”
“Yes.”
Something didn’t feel right. Both women started giggling, and even Dolguol and Sulbbang joined in.
Wait. Did I guess wrong? My bad feeling was confirmed as the taller woman flashed a sly smile, patted my shoulder, and said:
“I’m Sansae.”
“What?!”
“Haha, that surprised you? Doesn’t quite match your mental image, huh?”
Only then did they introduce themselves.
“I’m Elderin! Yuserin.”
“Sansae. Kim Shin-ah.”
“I’m Han Da-eun. My game name is… Gawol.”
“And you’re very pretty, Gawol. I’ll have to show you off in my lounge later.”
“Right, would you mind if we took some photos together?”
I wasn’t too keen on the photos, but it seemed rude to refuse after all this hospitality.
After a moment’s hesitation, I nodded. I’d always planned to go public someday. These two seemed trustworthy, and even if the pictures leaked, it’d only be a matter of time.
“It’s fine to take them… just don’t post them online.”
“Of course! They’re just for me! No one else will see them. They’ll be my treasure.”
“Can I be in them too?”
“Sure…”
Oh, no. I already feel drained.