The puppy was cute. It felt like we could be friends.
Well, I did kill it with my own hands, though.

What am I even saying?
Why would I kill a puppy?
It was a bit big to be called a puppy, but still, it trusted me and followed me around.

There’s blood splattered on my hands.
The corpse is disappearing, evaporating into thin air.

Did I kill it?
Why would I do that?
Even though it was a monster, it didn’t attack. It was gentle.

What if it hadn’t been a monster but a person, leaning on my lap?
Would I have stabbed and killed them the same way?
Am I supposed to kill anyone just because I’m told to?

I didn’t want to kill it.
So, if anything or anyone stands in front of me, it’s going to be a problem.
This isn’t good.

"...Ugh..."

On top of that, I keep remembering when I got stabbed.
Still, it’s bearable.
I felt a sudden rush of emotions, but I managed to hold it back.
I’m fine with this much,

"Ugh."

This much is no problem at all.
What, did you think I couldn’t handle something like this?
Killing an animal is nothing.

[13 hours 45 minutes]

There’s still plenty of the drug's effect left.
It’s not particularly unpleasant.
Though, in a way, that’s also a problem.

"You just killed a monster, that’s all. You did well," Yuram said.
It seems like the puppy looked a bit too ferocious to her eyes.

"Do you see anything?"

"See what?"

"Like a level-up or something. When you kill monsters, you often get stronger. Though some require specific conditions to grow stronger."

Level-up.
Is that how it works? Kill enough of them, and you get stronger?
I’m not sure if Hansihu killed that many monsters.
The protagonist was strong even before he entered the academy.
That’s why he’s the protagonist, I guess.

I think he leveled up at some point, too.
How did that work again?

"Well, I’ve been teaching for a long time, so I have a rough idea. I can tell what helps someone grow."

"Is that so."

Growth.
It’s a nice word.

"You probably have something too. Even if it's a drug-enhanced ability."

Then I’ll just use more drugs.
As Yuram herself mentioned before.
That’s how it is.

"Next, three of them."

"Three?"

"Yeah. The first real combat trial at the academy usually goes like this. After you take down ten wolves, depending on your ability, the next ones are like bear-shaped monsters or… Anyway, let’s start."

With a snap of her fingers, three wolves were summoned.
They were bigger than the one I killed earlier.
I’d better deal with them properly.

Yeah, properly.
I should try fighting well.
Isn’t that how the protagonist would do it?
But I can’t do it.

They aren’t even barking, just standing there like tame dogs.
They don’t approach me either.
No matter how messed up someone is, they wouldn’t attack creatures like these.

But since I’m ordered to do it, I guess I have to.
It hurts, but I can’t help it.
Still, maybe I should resist once.
I want to see if I can disobey a command and hold out.

"Alright, go ahead and attack the three over there."

There’s no need to attack immediately.
She didn’t say when to attack.

Stab.
Crack.

About three seconds later.
I slaughtered them brutally.
This is a power that’s beyond control.
Thinking back, there’s nothing in life I’ve been able to control.
If I wanted control, I shouldn’t have taken the drugs.

[9 hours 58 minutes]

It’s not like taking the drugs was really my choice.
When you're in pain, taking medicine is the right thing to do, isn’t it?

"Five this time."

This time, I’m going to try to stop.
Yuram doesn’t care much about what I do.
She knows that I’ll attack eventually.
The wolves still don’t try to attack me.

"Isn’t this enough? Five should be fine, right?"

"Sorry, but I need to submit accurate data. Attack."

Stab, stab.
Crunch.

The long blade pierced through the wolves.
I’m definitely stronger now.
Stronger than when I fought Hansihu.

"Next, ten of them."

This isn’t good.
I feel bad.

[5 hours 56 minutes]

"Wait, stop."

It’s not about feeling sorry for the wolves.
Fighting like this is too inefficient.
Generating and extending the weapon is consuming the drug’s effects at an alarming rate.

"They’re just monsters. If you really want to become an academy student, you should endure."

Endure?
Endure what?
The time slipping away?

"No, I mean, the drugs—"

"Come on, attack."

"I’m saying—"

Crack.
The giant sword pierced through ten wolves.
Well, seven, to be exact.
The remaining ones didn’t die because the sword disappeared.

[0]

"...It hurts."

I couldn’t kill all ten wolves.
How is that possible? I crushed each one excessively.
No way I couldn’t kill all ten.
Yuram finally looked at Yuseoa.

Did she just say it hurts?

Yuseoa, who had stabbed herself without flinching, now says she’s in pain.
Something’s wrong.
Her knees give out, and she collapses to the ground.
She needs the drug.

The wolves are rushing toward her.

"Damn it."

With the drug’s effect gone, her affinity with the wolves disappeared too.
Still, these monsters are no match for Yuram alone.
Besides, this is a training ground.
With a snap of her fingers, the monsters would return to where they came from.

"The drug's effect faded faster than I thought. You won’t be able to fight much longer like this."

She pulled out a syringe from her bag.
No need to remove the bandage.
The needle was designed to go straight through her thin clothes.

Stab.

After a moment, Yuseoa regained her senses.

"Are you okay? Sorry, I should’ve given you the shot sooner."

Her eyes were unfocused.
She was trembling.

"Doctor."

"Yuseoa?"

Yuram was startled.
It seemed like she wasn’t in her right mind.
She was asking for a doctor, but didn’t seem to know Yuram was one.

"Insects instead of joints…"

She appeared to be hallucinating.
It’s a temporary phenomenon.
All Yuram had to do was observe and stay calm.
She lifted Yuseoa and sat her on a chair.

"My muscles are melting."

She mumbled to herself.
A sedative wouldn’t work in this state.
She needed another shot.
She wouldn’t live long anyway.

Poor girl.
She really is a sick girl.
The guilt Yuram had been suppressing began to surface.

"I told you to run away, didn’t I?"

Yuseoa didn’t seem to hear, lost in her hallucinations.

Stab.

Two shots of sedative.
This should calm her down.

Yuseoa’s body visibly relaxed, and her hallucinations seemed to fade away.

"...It hurts."

She looked like a child throwing a tantrum.
Tear streaks and drool stained her face.
She looked exhausted.

In fact, this state is closer to normal.
Better than smiling while under the drug’s influence.

"I… I don’t want to take the drugs anymore."

But there’s no way to stop.
The fact that she’s saying that just means the addiction is fading temporarily.

"It’s just temporary. Take a rest."

How many drugs had she taken just this morning?
In hindsight, it was way too much.
Her outward appearance and her silly smiles.
She’d used far too many.

No, she had been holding on well enough.
Not calculating the drug's duration was a mistake.
In the end, the answer is to use more drugs.
If you see her as a fighter and not a patient, that’s the only conclusion.

"Combat is on hold. There are too many issues."

It’s enough that we confirmed the existence of the affinity.
Combat is a secondary matter.

"I want to go home."

Yuseoa looked down at the floor.
She wanted to go back.
Back to the past.

"I’m sorry."

In the end, Yuram blurted out an apology.

"But… I have my reasons too. It’s not like I’m doing this because I enjoy it."

She tried to console herself with pathetic excuses.
It’s Yuseoa’s choice, after all, she thought. It’s for the best—for both of them and Hansihu.

Just an excuse.
But she had a reason.

She needed to do this.
To fulfill her role as an academy instructor.
But why did she have to do it?

"I lost my family to monsters too... Being a doctor and an awakened healer didn't matter. I couldn't save my family."

That’s where her hatred for monsters came from.
Revenge.
She thought Yuseoa might understand.
She wanted to believe that Yuseoa would sympathize.
But forcing Yuseoa to attack, thinking she'd develop some sort of affinity for the monsters, was definitely a mistake.

"I still have one family member left, though."

She had a younger sister.
A sister who was still alive.
Without the academy’s support, there was no way to save her.
She was trapped at the academy, but it didn’t matter.
As long as she could save her sister.

"Yeah. I’ve got a little sister. My only remaining family."

Somehow, she saw a bit of herself in Yuseoa.
But if she had to choose between the two, she would, without hesitation, choose her sister over Yuseoa.

"That's… fortunate."

Yuseoa responded with a bright smile.
That wasn’t the reaction Yuram had expected.
She wasn’t trying to say something comforting.
She just wanted to vent the things that had been weighing on her while Yuseoa was under the drug’s influence.

But when Yuseoa smiled like that, what was she supposed to feel?
Yuram stared blankly at her.

"It’s good to have family."

That’s true.
Having someone to rely on gives you peace of mind.
Even if it's not reliance, even if they’re just someone you want to protect.
Having family brings a sense of security.

Who is Yuseoa’s family?
It must be Hansihu.
And for Hansihu, Yuseoa is probably the family he wants to protect.

Yuram didn’t want to ruin someone else’s family.
That’s why she gave Yuseoa the chance.
She told her to run.
She would help her as much as she could.

"I don’t have family, but… I have friends. I’m always the one receiving, though…"

Yuseoa continued, her voice trailing off.

"Someday, I’ll be able to help them..."

She seemed to believe that someday, she’d be able to return the favor.
If she became strong enough.
Family is precious to everyone.