NoveLight ™
Damn it. I’ve officially been branded as a Casanova, or rather, a full-blown lesbian.
And what's this "Hansooji and Reina Coin" nonsense?
The curse words just keep spilling out of my mouth, and to top it off, Choi Siwoo showed up as well.
No, I have absolutely no intention of letting an erect male organ anywhere near my body.
"Wait, wouldn’t this all be solved if I just don't date anyone? What if I say I’m misanthropic and hate both men and women?"
I decided to give it a try.
Title: Yoonha Hates Humans and Doesn't Like Anyone
I saw her back in middle school, and she doesn’t like men or women.
She said she’ll live alone forever.
Wait, did I just out myself as a freak?
I had resigned myself to being labeled a lesbian after that whole ordeal with Hansooji, but why are these people so worked up?
And no, I'm definitely not into kids.
MILFs, though? Maybe... but at least not kids.
Fine, it's just a dream anyway. Who cares if they think I’m a lesbian?
Choi Siwoo is undoubtedly a piece of trash with an NTR fetish. It’s only because this is a dream that he’s been given that kind of character. He’s the type who’d hand his wife over to me for some scissoring action once he gets married.
Yeah. I’ll proudly embrace being a lesbian.
"Come to think of it, Bbeommi-jang was pretty cute too."
Maybe if I just taped her mouth shut... No, wait, that’s rape. Anyway, that’s not the point right now.
Kim Seungjun, that bastard. I need to deal with him quickly.
In the original story, Choi Siwoo was supposed to kill him to grow as a character.
It's part of his trial.
But just letting it happen feels frustrating.
Besides, that guy’s already targeting me, and things have deviated far too much from the original plot.
"Surely, he won’t turn into a monster because of me, right? I mean, this is the guy who threw a fit because he couldn’t get the divine sword."
At the core of it, Choi Siwoo is the problem.
In the original, he wasn’t this laid-back. He was a righteous, simple-minded fool who always stood up for what he believed in, and though he depended on the divine sword, he wasn’t always arrogant about it. In fact, the sword didn’t lend its power freely; it only gave him strength when it served to train him.
Of course, the divine sword can’t just pour out its power for anyone, or its avatar would die, but still.
In the original, Choi Siwoo struggled against Kim Seungjun.
"What should I do?"
Maybe the answer is to just not go to the academy anymore?
Honestly, isn’t it time for me to wake up from this dream?
"Would committing suicide make me wake up? What do you think?"
"......"
The man in the black suit still didn’t answer.
Whatever. I can’t just sit idly by. If I leave Kim Seungjun unchecked, the academy will be in danger.
In the original story, the academy played a pivotal role, but now it could all be ruined because of Kim Seungjun’s chaos.
I could deal with him using acceleration repeatedly.
Or, I could just run away.
Still, I need to figure out what Choi Siwoo’s up to. Why is he acting so relaxed?
In the original, he idolized Eugene Seok and worked tirelessly to become stronger, spending every moment outside of eating and sleeping practicing with his sword.
But now, that lunatic is just watching me, taking it easy.
"I feel like a guinea pig in some experiment."
I’m curious about what’s going on in his head, but it’s clear he wouldn’t tell me even if I asked.
For now, I have no other choice. I have to follow along with the events. All I’ve got are my acceleration ability, parallel circuits, and maybe a little charm.
I need to gather more information about Kim Seungjun.
His profile only shows him as some academy punk, nothing else. But since the original story has changed, who knows what new elements he’s hiding?
Come to think of it, Geum Taeyang gave me a business card.
Honestly, I don’t want to contact him again. It’s Geum Taeyang, after all. Unlike idiots like Reina and Hansooji, who get off on a spanking, this guy’s a different kind of fool.
But right now, I need to survive.
Even in a dream, my survival instincts are strong. So, I sent in the request.
Ding.
Not long after I texted Geum Taeyang, I got a reply.
NTR Actor: "Sis, this guy’s an orphan, too!"
Yoonha: "I’m an orphan too, you bastard. Give me something useful."
NTR Actor: "Sorry, haha. Aside from that, he spends all his time either at the academy or doing something shady at home. Oh, and he’s obsessed with gathering information about the divine sword."
That shady stuff might be related to him turning into a monster.
And he’s been looking into the divine sword...
Oh! That’s it! How could I forget?
Yoonha is technically the sister of Eugene Seok, the divine sword’s wielder.
That’s why he’s jealous and taking it out on me, his stronger sister who could never use the sword.
Basically, I’ve become his new target.
Especially since I’m more well-known than Choi Siwoo, the second user of the divine sword.
It all makes sense now.
NTR Actor: "Also, he’s got a record of being bullied until middle school?"
Yoonha: "How come?"
NTR Actor: "Apparently, he worshipped something weird."
Yoonha: "Like, Black God cult stuff?"
NTR Actor: "Could be. Bullied kids always have a reason, I guess."
Well, Yoonha herself was almost bullied in middle school, so it seems like this guy turned out as expected.
A kid who bullies the weak and steals other people's girls.
At least this time, I rewarded him for his efforts by giving him six gift certificates for mint choco ice cream at a local shop.
Yoonha: "Good job."
NTR Actor: "Wow, sis. This is... a lot."
I could practically hear him trembling in joy.
NTR Actor: "How did you know I love mint choco? Six tubs? I can eat this all day! Thanks!"
This guy is something else.
And within five minutes, he’d already used all six certificates. He wasn’t joking; he really loves mint choco.
NTR Actor: "People who don’t appreciate the beauty of mint choco are missing out. Am I right, sis?"
I couldn’t be bothered to reply, so I just sent a half-hearted "yeah."
Anyway, the investigation on Kim Seungjun is complete.
In summary, he was bullied for being into something weird in middle school, is obsessively attached to the divine sword, and now sees me as his target.
By now, he’s probably either absorbed a monster core or made a pact with a demon.
"When the real trouble starts, it’ll be during the dungeon exploration."
That’s when he’ll lose it inside the dungeon and transform into a monster.
The problem is, I’ll be in the same team as Kim Seungjun.
If I remember the original story, I should be assigned to Group 3.
Let’s recall the lineup.
Group 3: Choi Siwoo, Yoonha, Kim Seungjun, Park Jaesang.
Great. I’m stuck with Choi Siwoo.
Actually, that might be a good thing. With him around, Kim Seungjun will target me instead of him, which works in my favor.
How much time do we have left?
According to the schedule, the dungeon exploration is tomorrow. That’s when things will go down.
"Now that I think about it, why didn’t the flaming bat instructor tell us about the dungeon?"
"In the original, she didn’t give us any information either, but come on! Isn’t she being way too lazy? She’s basically doing the bare minimum of her job as an academy instructor.
She’s supposed to brief us about the dungeon the day before. It’s like going on a school field trip without the teacher telling you where you're going until the last minute.
I pulled out my phone and sent a message to everyone I knew, including Reina, letting them know about the dungeon tomorrow. They’d better get their equipment ready.
'Wait. Hold on. Then I have a problem.'
Reina has the ‘World Tree Spirit Bow,’ an heirloom weapon passed down from her elven ancestors.
Hansooji, the fiery spear girl, owns a myth-level weapon called the ‘Spear of Yeohwa.’ And of course, Choi Siwoo has the divine sword, which is in a league of its own.
But what about me?
‘I’m screwed.’
There’s no way I can rely on the academy’s sparring equipment.
Should I use Geum Taeyang’s help? Or maybe ask Bbeommi-jang for a favor?
Since she’s from a big guild, she might be able to lend me a weapon. Yeah, that could work. I know Bbeommi’s number, so I decided to message her.
Yoonha: "Bbeommi-jang?"
Kim Bbeommi: "Hawawa. Is my white-haired big sis talking to me?"
She’s older than me, yet she talks like that.
Whatever.
Yoonha: "I have a dungeon exploration at the academy tomorrow. Could I borrow a sword or something? My last one broke during the Cloud Dungeon, remember?"
Kim Bbeommi: "Oh! I can give you one, no need to borrow. Since you saved me last time, I can get you a new one."
Yoonha: "When can I pick it up?"
Kim Bbeommi: "I’ll have the sword ready by today, just let me know which dungeon you’re going to, and I’ll get it to you on time."
As expected, Kim Bbeommi is the real deal.
She hands out swords like it’s no big deal.
Is this what they call a woman’s loyalty?
Though, I’m a bit worried about what favor she’ll ask of me in return later, but for now, I need a weapon to deal with Kim Seungjun.
There’s so much to prepare if I want to avoid getting stabbed in the back tomorrow.
‘If only that gloomy guy in the suit would help me out.’
He just sits there, casually tapping away on his keyboard like some kind of maniac. He’s not even pretending to work at this point.
The next day, as expected, at Hansung Academy, the flaming bat instructor spoke up in her usual bored tone.
"So today, we’ll be heading into the 'Goblin Maze' dungeon. Everyone, get ready~"
"What?! You were serious?!"
Reina was completely shocked.
She probably didn’t expect the hero’s colleague, the flaming bat, to be such a slacker.
Honestly, she’s just lazy. In the original, she always pulled this, never properly preparing us for the dungeons or gates we entered.
"Told you she’s like that."
I shrugged as one of the cadets from afar mustered up the courage to shout out.
"Wait, instructor, why are you telling us this only now?"
"Well, I’m telling you now, aren’t I?"
"You should have told us earlier!"
"Well, no one asked me before now, did they?"
As you can see, the flaming bat is beyond shameless.
I bet that’s why Eugene Seok just let her go.
If I were a guy, I’d avoid a woman like her too—one of those types who’d roll around in bed and then casually say, ‘By the way, today’s my dangerous day.’
Surprisingly, and I mean really surprisingly, that’s exactly how the flaming bat’s route ends in Eugene Seok’s story.
‘There’s no fixing her. Huh?’
I felt someone glaring at me, and when I turned my head, I saw Kim Seungjun’s ugly face staring at me with pure malice.
Unlike yesterday, his face was twisted with hatred, like he was ready to kill someone. That murderous intent was directed at me.
"It’s clear now. He’s definitely targeting me."
Up until this morning, I still had a sliver of hope that he’d go after Choi Siwoo.
But no.
Maybe running away right now is the best option?
No, with this guy, he’d probably come after me when I’m alone. That would be even worse.
"Hey, Yoonha."
"What’s up, Divine Sword Wielder, Choi Siwoo?"
He narrowed his eyes, clearly displeased by my tone, which only made my frustration boil over.
Thanks to him, I’m in this mess, and yet here he is, casually calling out the heroines' names.
"It seems like Kim Seungjun has his sights set on you."
"I’m well aware, thanks."
That’s exactly why I don’t like you. If only you had stuck to your original boring script, I wouldn’t be in this mess."