No, no, no, no.
What about the cool beauty persona?
I had no intention of spilling the whole truth right now. But since I had already mentioned that I knew something, I had to at least create the atmosphere that I had some understanding of the truth. That way, Mia Crowfield could accept it and move on.
What happened to “I don’t know what expression to make at times like these”?
In that brief moment, I frantically racked my brain.
Should I just rewind time? Go back two weeks and start over?
But then, would I be able to maintain my persona for another two weeks?
Is there another option? I searched for a way to navigate this situation without breaking my ‘cool beauty’ image.
And then...
"Also, the things you saw... were practice."
I blurted out nonsense.
I had intended to steer the conversation away, but instead, I just said something ridiculous.
...Practice? Seriously? Who practices yawning or sniffling? Even Mia Crowfield, with her naive side, wouldn’t believe such a story—
"Practice...?"
...Or would she?
Mia had been thorough enough to follow me around. She wouldn’t have just followed me without carefully preparing and planning. The fact that she had hidden all these things under her bed made that much clear.
But still, this was Mia Crowfield.
She had grown up without friends, raised with her mother's hatred toward the Emperor. In some ways, she was similar to Claire from the original story, though their outcomes were different.
She could plan things out and was skilled enough in magic to oppose the Emperor, but she struggled with personal relationships.
"Yes, practice," I said, deciding to push forward with this bizarre narrative. If worse came to worst, I could always rewind time and try again.
At the moment, the advantage was mine. Mia Crowfield didn’t have her staff in hand, at least.
"I..." I furrowed my brow slightly. Even that small gesture must have caused a noticeable change in my expression since I usually didn’t move my face at all. The only people who had ever seen me make a face like this were probably Jayden or Lucas—or both.
"I don’t know how to express emotions well."
I lied through my teeth.
The idea that I couldn’t express emotions was absurd. I’d spent time rolling around on my bed, making goofy faces while eating sweets. I was an incredibly emotional person.
Sure, I had erased those moments by rewinding time, but I was trying my best to maintain a stoic, emotionless persona. And yet, here I was, caught acting otherwise.
"But the way you... yawned and nodded off—"
"Practice," I repeated, resolutely maintaining the lie.
I wasn’t sure if she would actually buy it, but I was counting on the image of Mia Crowfield I had from the game.
"If I suddenly started showing emotions, it would catch people off guard."
People had, in fact, been caught off guard. Alice could read my expressions somewhat, but I hadn’t openly smiled in front of anyone. When I had made a slight face while eating parfaits, people had been visibly shocked.
"Dozing off... was practice?" Mia mumbled, her face a picture of confusion.
Damn it, I forgot about that.
Practicing how to nod off and yawn? It was bizarre. Maybe I could have gotten away with practicing a smile or a tearful expression, but this?
But the problem was, I had already committed to this lie. My only other option was to rewind time, and I didn’t want to resort to that yet. So I stuck to my story.
"Practice isn’t just about facial expressions," I continued, pushing forward. "It’s not enough to just change your face. People recognize emotions through more than just facial expressions."
"..." Mia stayed quiet, listening intently.
"For example, if I were to try smiling," I said, barely moving my eyes and only raising the corners of my lips. Mia flinched, recoiling slightly at the sight of my awkward smile.
"How does it look? Does it seem natural?"
"No, not at all," Mia responded, clearly unsettled, taking two steps back until her back hit the door.
Good. That was the reaction I wanted. It wasn’t just an awkward smile—it was the kind of smile where your lips smile but your eyes don’t. The kind of expression that would make someone feel uneasy. That was what I was aiming for.
...Maybe I should use this expression on others if I ever need to unsettle them.
"Facial expressions involve many parts of the face. It’s not just about the shape of the mouth, but also the eyes. And it’s not just about smiling—there are different kinds of smiles. A grin is different from a laugh, and when laughing, sound plays a role. Would you like me to demonstrate a laugh I’ve been practicing?"
"N-no, that’s okay," Mia quickly declined, looking horrified.
...
Well, that was intentional, but her reaction still stung a bit.
Mia Crowfield was quite the beauty, as expected of a heroine from a game. Her somewhat awkward personality, combined with her tragic backstory, gave her a lot of charm. She was a popular character because of that gap between her personality and her appearance.
"Facial expressions are complex, so I’ve been working on simpler actions," I explained. "Things like nodding off or yawning are easier to mimic without changing my expression."
"..."
Mia still seemed unsure, but the furrowed brow she had been sporting moments ago was gone.
"I’ve been practicing how to look like an ordinary person, acting in ways that most people would expect. That’s probably what you saw."
It wasn’t exactly a revolutionary concept, but it reminded me of a storyline from a different manga. A robot, designed to mimic human behavior, practiced actions based on what it had observed from people. The protagonist had been devastated when they realized the robot’s behavior wasn’t genuine. It was a hard sci-fi anime, and I hadn’t finished it because it was too depressing.
"..." Mia continued to stare at me for a long time without saying a word.
Would she believe me?
It wouldn’t be surprising if she didn’t. From Mia’s perspective, I was the last person she should trust. Who would believe the person who killed their father?
But on the other hand... she didn’t have much choice.
Mia had clearly been confused by the sight of me behaving like an ordinary person. If she was inclined to see me as an unfeeling killer, this explanation might actually make sense to her. In a twisted way, it was easier to accept the idea that my human-like behavior was a calculated act.
"..."
After a long silence, Mia remained frozen in place, seemingly processing everything.
I extended my right hand toward her.
Mia flinched as if startled, her eyes widening in surprise when she saw what I was offering her.
In my hand was the gun, the handle facing her.
If she wanted, she could take it and shoot me.
Of course, I didn’t expect her to do that.
Mia Crowfield had failed to kill Claire in the original story because, deep down, she wasn’t the kind of person who could take someone’s life. She was timid and had grown up without friends. What she really wanted, deep down, was for someone to befriend her.
Even Claire, who had a biting personality and had grown up hardened by her environment, had softened after getting to know Mia. Claire had been harsh, but she wasn’t a bad person.
Mia had never been able to follow through with killing Claire because, by the time she discovered Claire was involved in her father’s death, they had grown too close.
So I handed the gun to Mia, thinking about that situation.
Mia Crowfield may have circumstantial evidence, but she didn’t have any concrete proof. She wasn’t even sure if I was the one who had killed her father.
She wouldn’t shoot me.
And if she did... well, as long as it wasn’t a fatal shot, I could rewind time.
Mia’s trembling hands accepted the gun.
She stared at me, her expression blank.
"If you’re sure you need to kill me, go ahead and shoot," I said calmly.
"..." Mia opened her mouth as if to speak, but no words came out.
"Someday, you’ll learn the full truth about what happened. And when that day comes, if you still think I deserve to die, then fine. Shoot me. I won’t dodge the bullet."
"Can’t you just... tell me now?" Mia asked, her voice weak.
"Not right now. You’re not ready to hear it."
"..."
Mia bit her lip, clearly frustrated.
"If the day comes when you’re ready to hear the truth and you still don’t understand, I’ll tell you everything myself. I’ll tell you what really happened."
"..."
Mia lowered her head, her shoulders slumping in defeat.
I carefully walked past her.
Thankfully, I didn’t get shot in the back on my way to the door. Phew.
"Oh, and," I said, turning slightly to look at her.
"Please keep what I said about ‘practice’ between us. It’s not quite a finished performance yet."
"...I will," Mia replied weakly.
Satisfied with her response, I turned back and opened the door.
My heart was pounding in my chest.
Honestly, I wanted to scream out in triumph—
—But I couldn’t afford to get caught.
I forced myself to maintain a normal pace as I walked back to my room.