Chapter 186

I fell down after a short scream at the sudden appearance of Renald. He frowned and covered his ears. "Hey! Why are you yelling all of a sudden!"

"Oh, why are you walking around so dark at dawn?"

"Hmm? Huh! You're so elegant looking for a dog hole at dawn?" "..."

My mouth was shut at his rebuttal for the first time in a long time. '...God, damn it.'

I never expected Renald to wake up while even trained knights was still asleep at dawn.

The fact that I considered him as the one of the character who might have been brainwashed by the heroine made me nervous. I was pouting my lips and thinking about what excuse to make.

"Aren't you going to stand up sooner? Your clothes are dirty."

Renald gave me his hand with a pout. I looked at him with astonished eyes for a moment, and soon ignored it and jumped out of my seat. He asked, as I was brushing off my dirty clothes.

"...Geez, are you going to leave home?" "Hey, you?"

"What?"

"You're going to tell father?"

When I asked back instead of an answer, the blue eyes shook for a moment. He stared at me for a moment and opened his mouth.

"If I tell father... So you're not going out?"

His question was a bit strange. If he tell the Duke that I secretly looked for a dog hole, he would surely try to lock me up, but then what was the point of my recovery?

"Well."

I imaged the worst. The escape was blocked and the piece could be taken away by a scary heroine. And the idea of a brainwashed person being driven to death as a vicious villainess who torments the hostess...

I wanted to try to die again, I didn't want to die like that in a fucking place.

'...Come to think of it, I failed this time because of crazy automatic payment, but if I try again, I might escape.'

Suddenly this thought went that far further. I muttered to myself like I was talking to myself. "...Let's just die again."

"Hey—!"

Then, Renald shouted.

"There's nothing you can't say in front of your brother! Are you crazy? You barely survived, and...!" "Then don't tell father."

I cut off his words in the middle and gave him a cold grunt. "If you don't want to see me die again."

"You...! Ahhh!"

He frowned and swept his hair up roughly. He was staring at me with a pouted look on his face, and soon reached out and grabbed my arm.

"...Follow me."

"Uh...!"

And turning to him, I stumbled, and in a daze I had no choice but to follow him. "Where are you going?"

"..."

"Renald, where are we going?"

"Ah! If you keep on hitting me, I will run to our father and tell him everything. Huh?"

It was not a strong force, so I could quickly stop walking, but it was not the way back to the mansion. He didn't seem to be trying to extradite me yo the duke immediately. So I obeyed him in silence.

After a long walk on the opposite side of the original path, Renald stopped near a unfamiliar wall. Under this wall, piles of straw were piled up. It was a place where knights collected the remains of scarecrows used for training.

For a moment, I took a look at Renald and soon he put my wrist down and walked towards him. Then he got through a mountain of straw. A bumpy hole was revealed soon after it was opened.

"Uh..."

It was hard to believe that the Renald had revealed me of it. As I stared blankly at the new hole and blinked my eyes, he said crookedly.

"This place was blocked because of you earlier. That's why the knights are calling you..." He suddenly stopped talking. The reason was unknown.

I approached it, taking little notice, and glanced around. Renald asked with a very cautious voice. "...Are you really going out of the house?"

"I don't know. I haven't decided for sure yet."

I finished memorizing the surrounding terrain with a casual reply. Then came back to Renald, I was incredibly surprised as he had told me about this hole.

"Can you... not go?"

"...What?"

"My father said he would never let you go outside. Don't think of running away from home, can't you just keep living here?"

"Why?"

I asked back as if I really didn't get why he kept talking about it. "You hated me. Isn't it better for both of us if I'm gone?" "That's..."

Renald's expression was awfully distorted at my words. It was similar to the one when it occurred right after the fight in the attic. As if he was having a hard time listening to me.

"It can't be."

I laughed at the funny family when I thought about it. The devil who pushed me to the limit every time, young Penelope and man who was possessed by me, he can't be troubled.

"...That's right. I really hated you that time."

My sudden laughter made my lips curl up and I gave him a hard word of answer.

"I didn't think Yvonne would ever come back that time."

It was a scabbing sound. I faintly nodded my head, seeing my reaction he suddenly looked teary.

"Don't nod! And you... do you think you had a nice personality? I had been in a hell because of a beating!"

"Huh. What did you say? Why are you suddenly talking about this?"

"I'm trying to eat and get along, but do you know how awful it has been to me? I still have the scar from your pinch the day before you coming-of-age ceremony!"

When he saw me dumbfounded by the sudden complain, he grunted and rolled up his sleeves. There were really nail marks on the inside of the suddenly protruding wrist which was darker than the other skin.

'This is a little refreshing.' I laughed with joy.

"I'm sorry, okay?"

"Ah! This's..."

When he was getting angry, Renald slapped his chest a couple of times.

An awkward silence fell between us when he closed his mouth. I found a hole, so I had nothing more to see. I was about to say, "I'm going back to my room, looking at the faint sky of the dawn."

"...On the Coming-of-Age ceremony, when you suddenly fell down with a burst of blood." He suddenly talked about topics that I didn't want to bring up by Renald.

"At first I thought you were kidding." "What...?"

"The day before my coming-of-age ceremony, I fell from a tree in front of your window and pretended to be dead, and you cried a lot."

Thanks to you, our father cut down that tree right away, and you went crazy again. Renald added humorously.

I kept silent because I didn't know it.

"When this old man (Marquis) said she might have been poisoned, I thought this bastard had caused another accident. Actually, I didn't believe it."

"..."

"What do you honestly think about, drinking poison and doing self-created acts? Buy yourself everything you want, do whatever you want. My father tried to kick you out because Yvonne had come back, you thought so, didn't you?"

"..."

"But during the week you lay there bleeding, I called in all the servants to investigate."

The darkened face Renald, who was rambling on himself, gradually turned pale. He was like a suffocated man, who was trying to recover his breath which he had lost.

"No one knows what you usually did, where you went, or who you're meeting. Even your own maid." "..."

"How could you do that? Fuck, how can she not know anything about your paycheck for the master?"

He asked me in a fierce voice. It was fortunate that Emily faithfully implemented what I had ordered in advance to be consistent with no matter what. But others were none of my business.

'You made it that way.'

I didn't have to say what I had said many times. Now that he was well aware of it, too.

"That's where it is." "..."

"Since then, I've been... It reminds me of how badly I treated you." "..."

"I know. Yvonne's necklace, I put it in your room and framed you, and there's a lot more things to do wrong."

Renald blurted out like a rapid-fire shot and lifted his shoulders. His eyes were reddening before he knew it.

"But I didn't want to admit it. Then I can't count my faults against you... and I'm sure you wouldn't accept my apology."

"..."

"At some point... you started treating me or my family like a complete stranger."

Every time he panted shallowly, his lovely pink hair crumbled into the air. I just looked at it with an expressionless face. My eyes met with him, and his face was so blurry as of he cried as he looked at me as on the day of this accident.

"I've been thinking about it dozens of times these days. If I had been a little more like you then, instead of being such a jerk..."

"..."

"Wouldn't you be that far off?"

I didn't know that either. I wouldn't have considered you at some point when you were treating me as trash instead as your family.

But like he said, if you'd been a little nicer to Penelope... 'She wouldn't have died.'

Then I might not have had anything to do with it. I answered Renald dryly. "If you had, I might have hated this place less than now."

"...I'm sorry, Penelope."

Renald stammered saying these words like a strangled man.

"I never thought you'd be so sick of everything... and tried to die."

It was a belated apology. Because the parties couldn't know where the causes went from. I could not forgive him, because I was not Penelope after all.

Now it was the moment I looked up and faced him to answer that such words were meaningless. I suddenly opened my eyes wide to the sight of Renald.

"Renald."

With his head down, he was blocking his mouth with his fist. "Are... you crying?"

"Crazy, aren't you going to cry?!"

When I asked him, he shouted and clapped his mouth and rubbed his eyes with his fist. 'He is crying, he is crying.'

I thought to myself, and he shouted like he went into a rage. "I didn't cry!"

"Did I say something?" "I didn't cry!"

The man stared at me with his eyes as red as a rabbit, in protest. A while later, he relaxed his eyes and uttered.

"...Don't worry by yourself and tell me if you don't have enough money." "..."

"When you get out, go to the mercenary guild and hire guards first, and even if it costs a little more money, just use the hotel instead of the beggar's inn. Take with you self-defense magic weapon, like your scroll or something..."

"Brother."

I stopped Renald from planning my runaway and instead budded farewell him calmly. "Goodbye."

At that moment, Renald's face was twitched again. He hurriedly raised his fist and lowered his head. I waited silently for him to pour out all the old feelings, no more teasing him.

Translator: stupid_patato Raw provider: Rose439