Religion truly is the opiate of the masses.

The words of the great leader Chairman Mao, who exterminated sparrows with his finger and threw in tens of millions of Chinese lives for good measure, were right a hundred—no, a thousand—times over.

It’s barely been two months since I planted the seeds of this fake jihad cult…

So how is it that even in Riyadh, the capital of the Mahbad Sultanate, I’m already hearing cries of jihad echoing through the streets?

“The Great Allah has granted us permission for jihad! Brothers united under His name—let us pray together! May the Sultan hear Allah’s voice and declare a holy war!”
“Jihad is an opportunity! Those who die in the holy war will be comforted in paradise by seventy-two virgins, and those who survive shall be granted the lands of the infidels—and their people—as slaves!”
“Do not miss this once-in-a-lifetime holy war!”

Hundreds—maybe even close to a thousand—had gathered on the streets of the capital.

In the Toscani Empire, if anyone organized an unauthorized rally like this without reporting it to the government, the guards would storm in, yelling, “You treasonous bastard!” and drag the organizers away.