Chapter 26 - A Bad Dream

I could write both in my mother language and the language of this world. Although I had none of Jun’s memories, I could use her abilities. This was why I had an upsetting time in the beginning, because I remembered nothing about family and so on, despite having no difficulty communicating or using magic. I had no real use for Korean but it was convenient to use it when writing things only I was supposed to know. The language of this world was like English, which was why I wasn’t worried about my notes being discovered. Even if they were, the two languages were so distinct, the content wouldn’t be easy to decipher.

The quill smoothly glided across the paper as I jotted down everything I could recall about dungeons and item sources. Writing them down one by one was easy, perhaps because I was doing it for the second time. The first time I did it, back when I was part of the Fabian Corps, I had a horrible time practically squeezing my head for memories. I could still remember, clear as day, how I had labored in the room of an inn, working under the lamplight until the night became day. The result of my efforts was a semi-strategy book and it was thanks to memorizing its contents that I could recall everything with such ease.

“Done!” I cheered and gathered the papers I spent two whole days writing, making a booklet out of them. Since I would check it often, I opted to cover it with sturdy leather. Considering it was the second playthrough, I thought of letting Mayer know about the booklet, but I rejected the notion within seconds. If what Mayer wanted from me wasn’t my abilities as a support mage, but the information I knew… I would lose my value by telling him. Truthfully speaking, hadn’t Fabian set the precedent of abandoning me, thinking that he had learned everything I knew? Besides, I would just end up looking suspicious since the booklet had information on dungeons that Fabian hadn’t managed to clear previously.

Seeing how Mayer remembered me, he would doubtlessly remember which dungeons Fabian had cleared before. Knowing details about dungeons that hadn’t even been cleared before was perfect for drawing suspicion. It was better to only give hints here and there when the opportunity came. Of course, I didn’t think I could keep the booklet a secret forever since Mary would be reporting on whatever happened around me. This was a separate matter from the trust I had from her; her loyalty was owed to her wage payer—all she needed to do for me was to be a good assistant.

I wasn’t so shameless as to expect secrecy from Mary when I wasn’t even her employer. Still, it seemed better to hide for the time being, or at least until I made my faction within the corps. I was sure Mayer wouldn’t be ridiculous and reproach me for hiding it. He wasn’t completely open with me either, after all. Gotta keep our privacies, right?

One of the things I did very well was keeping Fabian in the dark regarding the second playthrough. Had I told him everything, things would’ve turned into an even bigger mess. The passage of time had returned rationality to me and I could plainly guess Fabian’s current thoughts. He without a doubt intended on growing a bit stronger to defeat the demon lord, which had to be why he didn’t want to give up on obtaining the Ring of Flame, as it would increase his attack power as a flame element user.

While I was with Fabian, I gave him clues about dungeons, pretending they were gained by using my support skills. He likely believed he could clear the second playthrough with the information I gave him and therefore didn’t feel the need to take me along. However, he would’ve likely been troubled had I joined another expedition corps and did the same for them; there was no need for two to be in the know, after all. Maybe that was why he had left me to die.

I didn’t lose my head in the clouds, thinking of how he left me, his comrade, or how he couldn’t be so horrible… My shattered trust made me question Fabian’s very nature. The facts spoke for themselves—if it weren’t for Mayer, I would’ve died alone in the dungeon.

In the present, I was a seasoned corps member, which was why I could hold on for far longer and why I could just barely meet up with Mayer. I had luck on my side too, of course. Had he been the tiniest moment later, Mayer would’ve found my dead body instead. Pity, oh pity. I was alive and well, and he was clueless that I had joined hands with Mayer Knox, the man he was most wary of.

I was glad Fabian didn’t know I remembered the first playthrough, as he wouldn’t have used such a passive method of getting rid of me otherwise. He would’ve killed me for certain. I ridiculed Fabian inwardly as I praised myself for my past decision.