Chapter 28. Embarrassing Words
***
“Student Han Chunsung… Have we perhaps met somewhere before?”
At Kali’s words, Chunsung’s thoughts suddenly stopped.
It was as if his mind had suddenly become a blank white sheet, and no thoughts could emerge.
‘How should I answer this?’
This wasn’t something he could easily answer and move past. The words I had uttered… they held too much meaning for Kali.
But in reality, nothing came to mind in his blank state.
“……”
As I stood there, unable to say anything, dumbfounded.
Kali gently shook her head for a moment.
“Ah, I’m sorry. What nonsense am I saying… We couldn’t have met. Student Han Chunsung. Please forget what I just said.”
“Yes. I understand.”
As I awkwardly replied, I felt that Kali’s gaze had clouded over, clearly different from before.
I had already… done something irreversible.
…
Afterwards, the meal time between the two was filled only with the small sounds of utensils, and the meal continued in silence.
The air suddenly became heavy, and awkwardness and discomfort were felt.
As Kali showed an awkward and subdued mood unlike her previous demeanor, Chunsung couldn’t readily speak to her either.
“…”
‘Those words’ I had uttered without realizing.
They were like a taboo for Kali now. And most people would never have brought them up.
So, Kali probably had no resistance to the shock of hearing those words.
Those words were from her past on the battlefield.
They were words habitually uttered by a nameless person who ‘died’ in Kali’s place in a critical situation. And at the same time, they were words that completely changed Kali.
It was a decisive moment that made her, who had been caught up in Talent supremacy in the past, completely abandon her thoughts and come to value effort and not look down on people with low-grade Talents.
But now, I had just uttered those exact words of that dead person in front of Kali.
Without missing a single syllable—.
“…”
Kali’s silent focus on the meal now felt strange.
So I found myself opening my mouth without realizing it.
“Instructor Kali.”
“…Huh?”
Looking at Kali, who responded awkwardly unlike before, I felt that I shouldn’t end this meeting like this.
‘As soon as the meal ends, I’ll part ways with Kali.’
If this meeting ended like this, it would be as if I had just inflicted a great wound on her.
Parting ways after touching a wound in Kali’s heart that no one had ever touched before… I didn’t like that.
I didn’t want to end my meeting with Kali like that.
“…”
Kali’s eyes, receiving my gaze, were wavering unlike before.
As if even she was confused by the turmoil of emotions. Nevertheless, she was facing me now as an instructor.
To listen intently to my words.
“I was really grateful during the entrance exam.”
“Ah, during the entrance exam…? No, it’s nothing. I just did what I had to do.”
Seeing Kali answer so unnaturally, I smiled faintly.
And at that moment, I calmly conveyed the emotions I had felt.
“The words Instructor Kali gave me during the entrance exam were really encouraging for me. Even though I was facing reality, honestly, my heart wasn’t that strong. I was more uncertain about whether I could move forward with my Common-grade Talent.”
“…Is that so? Ah, I see. That’s good then.”
As I kept mixing in words that were like taboo to her, Kali’s gaze looking at me sank even more.
She was now slightly avoiding my gaze altogether. I could clearly see in her attitude. That she was uncomfortable with my words and trying to look away.
And because of that,
I had to say more.
“The words Instructor Kali gave me then might not have been much. But they were really encouraging to me. Your words were a great help in me facing reality and moving forward. They had no small influence on why I was able to accept yesterday’s duel.”
I spoke in a calm voice.
There was no flutter or excitement like before when looking at her.
I was just conveying the facts.
And my words were sincere.
When taking the entrance exam, I certainly tried to step forward confidently. But only Kali had responded to my performance. Other examiners didn’t even speak to me, as if they weren’t interested at all.
That’s why I was able to have more confidence because of Kali, and even dreamed of the high goal of B-class in the entrance exam results. Even after that, the self-esteem and confidence in my actions were unconsciously influenced by Kali’s recognition.
Because she was the first to show interest in me. Because she recognized me.
No one else had shown interest in my Talent before, and no one had mentioned effort.
That’s why Kali’s words to me had been such a great encouragement, whether I realized it or not…
“……”
Even at my words, Kali just let out a small breath. She didn’t give any answer.
For her, she couldn’t stop my words now, nor could she explain why. She seemed to have chosen to listen silently.
Yet I felt anew.
How much of a shock ‘those words’ I had uttered had given to Kali.
In fact, that nameless person wasn’t in a romantic relationship with Kali, nor had they exchanged hearts.
Kali had been greatly shocked by the fact itself that the man had died because of her.
The words that man had uttered. And the reality that he had sacrificed his life to save her was too much for her.
And now I wanted to tell her.
That there are people who gain strength from your words too.
“So I gained confidence that I could do it. Facing reality and moving forward. That I could grow myself like that. Because your words, which recognized me uniquely in such an important place, were a great help… So I wanted to express my gratitude to you too, Instructor.”
As I finished my long speech, I smiled faintly again.
At my words, Kali finally showed a strange reaction.
“…”
Slowly raising her head, she met my gaze for the first time in a while. Yet I could clearly see her hesitate for a moment.
What that nameless person who died in Kali’s place on the battlefield had hoped for. She had completely changed her values due to that incident and came to value effort. She started to look at people’s essence without judging the level of their Talents.
And now. I was telling such a Kali.
That because of her words, I was able to move forward more, and gained confidence to face this reality.
After that, she completely changed her heart and acted differently, but those around her often took it as a joke, saying that someone who has everything is talking about effort.
And Kali was aware of this too.
But I thought that Kali’s mere awareness and actions didn’t have much meaning. I believed that such actions and heart only had proper meaning if they truly reached others.
And I was trying to answer that it had reached me, even if just a little.
“……”
Looking at Kali who was staring blankly at my words, I felt I had said all I needed to say.
“Then, Instructor. I’ll get up first. Thank you very much for the meal.”
As I finished speaking and rose from my seat, my feelings were strange.
Kali’s gaze looking at me was still mysterious.
To the point where it felt mysterious whether she had taken my words well or not.
‘Perhaps… were my words presumptuous?’
Whether I could heal even a little of the heart wound I had unintentionally touched…
Honestly, I wasn’t confident.
Yet belatedly, embarrassment filled my chest.
‘I really said some embarrassing things, didn’t I.’
Thinking about the words I had said to her, a bitter laugh escaped without me realizing.
Saying things that didn’t suit me at all.
Thud.
As I was moving, greeting the instructors I encountered respectfully.
“Wait a moment. Student Han Chunsung!”
Suddenly, Kali’s urgent voice was heard.
Thud.
At that, I had to stop in my tracks.
***
Curiosity.
And interest.
Even during the entrance exam, the emotions ‘Kali’ felt towards Han Chunsung were only to that extent.
Talent is Spearmanship, grade is Common without even needing to check. But he said he reached level 3. It felt natural.
That this student with the unique name Han Chunsung must have put in a tremendous amount of effort.
Reaching level 3 with a Common Talent was a level achieved by only a very small number of students entering each year.
However, after that, she didn’t pay much attention to that student.
But suddenly, she heard news about a duel that took place on the day of the entrance ceremony.
The unbelievable news that the top student Leonhardt and the student named Han Chunsung she had examined had a duel.
…When I first heard that news, I felt very bad. Because it felt like the ‘dirty act’ that upper-class students often commit against lower-class students.
Every year, such dirty acts always happened in the academy.
Upper-class students provoke lower-class students, and the lower-class students, unable to endure the provocation, request a duel.
And the result of the ensuing dirty duel is always the same…
It ends with the lower-class student’s miserable defeat.
The ridicule and contempt poured on the lower-class student afterwards. Even the devastating feelings the student must have felt after the duel.
Knowing how wrong all of this is.
Just hearing the news of the duel, I could feel all of this at once.
But I had no idea how surprised I was that the result of the duel was a draw.
Repeatedly confirming the facts, and only after directly finding the training instructor and hearing the detailed content of the duel, could I acknowledge it.
And I found myself thinking blankly.
—There is a student who has seen the fruits of true effort.
The three characters of the unique name ‘Han Chunsung’ came clearly to mind again, and I made the unreasonable request to directly find the C1 class instructor and change the class I was in charge of.
And finally, I was able to forcibly change to be in charge of the C1 class.
Afterwards. Until I directly faced the student while giving the first lecture, and various conversations took place during the meal.
I became more surprised about the student named Han Chunsung.
To the point where I wondered how many times I had been this surprised in my short 25-year life…
A completely different set of values from other students, depth of thought, drive, and decisiveness—he had nothing in common with other students.
So I had to be even more shocked by ‘those words’ I happened to hear.
—You can only move forward by facing reality.
‘How.’
How… could student Han Chunsung say those words?
How could this student utter those characteristic words that that man used to say habitually?
Without missing a single syllable.
I couldn’t properly know how I acted and thought afterwards.
Because my mind was blank.
My heart was greatly shaken by hearing such unexpected words. It wasn’t easy to maintain composure and listen to the student’s words.
And the student’s subsequent words gradually entered my ears.
Despite being so confused and shocked, strangely, student Han Chunsung’s words came to my ears as if whispering their meaning.
—So I gained confidence that I could do it. Facing reality and moving forward. That I could grow myself like that. Because your words, which recognized me uniquely in such an important place, were a great help… So I wanted to express my gratitude to you too, Instructor.
At that, I found myself meeting his gaze without realizing.
Knowing how confused and disheveled I must look right now. I couldn’t help but meet his gaze.
“Then, Instructor. I’ll get up first. Thank you very much for the meal.”
Finally, the student’s calm voice was properly heard.
Even though I wasn’t showing a very good appearance. The student was smiling faintly and rising from his seat.
And as I blankly watched the student’s retreating back.
Something… something felt strange.
A feeling that I shouldn’t let student Han Chunsung go like this.
…….
“Wait a moment. Student Han Chunsung!”
Without even realizing it, I was opening my mouth.