Ethan looked at me with a strange expression after our lips collided with a brief friction. For a moment, it seemed like he didn’t fully understand what had just happened.

It was only after seeing my face, burning red with embarrassment, that he finally seemed to realize that I had kissed him. Although it was a very brief kiss, the shock of it hadn’t yet worn off for him.

“…D-does this suffice as an answer?”

“……”

“I apologize for not being able to convince you with words. I didn’t think I could give you the assurance you needed, so I had to resort to this action.”

Still, I thought that this should be enough for Ethan to understand. After all, what woman would brazenly kiss a man she had no feelings for?

Moreover, in Lillis’s body, I had never kissed anyone other than Ethan. …Well, strictly speaking, I hadn’t in my previous life either, but that wasn’t relevant here.

I thought that perhaps now Ethan might release his grip on my arms and legs, but unfortunately, instead of relaxing, his hold only tightened, pressing down on me even harder.

“Young Master Ethan? Maybe it’s time to let go….”

“…It’s not enough yet.”

“…What?”

“You said before, Lillis, that a kiss is no big deal. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten that?”

…Right, I did say that.

As soon as he mentioned it, I recalled how I had nonchalantly claimed that a kiss was nothing special. What was I thinking, saying something so reckless?

“O-of course, I remember!”

“Really?”

“Did you think I was some crazy woman who goes around kissing just anyone without a care? What I said back then was just bravado… no, I said it to avoid burdening you, Young Master Ethan….”

“I don’t care what you were thinking when you said it. What I’m saying is that this isn’t enough.”

“…What?”

“Open your mouth, Lillis.”

“Mmmp?!”

The moment I instinctively parted my lips slightly in response to Ethan’s words, his face tilted at a 45-degree angle, and he pressed his lips down onto mine.

This time, it was a kiss that went deeper than our previous French kiss. Or rather, it felt even more intense than the one before. Back then, Ethan had only let his tongue enter my mouth while facing me directly, but now, he completely covered my mouth as if sealing it shut.

Ethan’s thick tongue invaded my mouth even deeper than before, exploring every inch as if it were his own domain.

-Lick, lick.

“Mmph?! Mmm, mmph…!”

-Lick, lick, lick.

“Mmm, mmph… Hmph, mmph….”

He ravaged the inside of my mouth—my lips, gums, the inside of my cheeks, behind my teeth, the tip of my tongue, and even underneath it.

Ethan turned our entwined mouths at different angles as he thrust his soft flesh deeper inside, thoroughly dominating the inside of my mouth.

In a way, this kiss felt as intimate as sex. As we exchanged bodily fluids through this deep intrusion, the thought briefly crossed my mind that this might actually be a form of sex.

We continued kissing for nearly a minute, and Ethan showed no sign of pulling away. I knew I had to make a decision.

-Smack.

“Mmm, mmph….”

-Smack, suck….

“Mmm, mmph… Ah….”

Thinking that perhaps my hesitation and avoidance were the problem, I decided to match his deep kiss and let him have his way.

Though he had suddenly forced his tongue into my mouth, saying that a mere kiss wasn’t enough, surely he wouldn’t keep me pinned down until morning.

If I just went along with what he wanted, exchanging kisses and sharing our tongues, I hoped he would be satisfied and pull away on his own.

It wasn’t that I wanted to indulge in Ethan’s stubborn behavior; I just wanted this uncomfortable situation to end as quickly as possible.

In that moment, I fleetingly thought that if the situation ended with just sharing the inside of my mouth rather than losing my virginity, I could consider myself fortunate.

…And so, about three minutes passed while we shared each other’s lips.

As we continued to exchange sensations through our lips and tongues, I felt a strange, indescribable sensation pulling from just below my sternum.

-Suck, suck.

“Mmm, mmph?!”

…What was that feeling just now?

It was just a kiss, yet I suddenly felt an odd sensation rising from below my body, which startled me.

I wondered if Ethan had somehow touched my body in the confusion, but his hands were still firmly gripping my wrists, unmoving. This only added to my confusion, as I couldn’t understand the source of the stimulating sensation my body seemed to be reacting to.

‘I felt something similar when Ethan touched my chest….’

As I was trying to comprehend why I felt that way, Ethan’s tongue, which had momentarily paused, resumed its movement, rubbing against mine, and I regained my focus on the intense kiss.

-Suck, suck.

“Mmm, mmph….”

-Lick, lick.

“Mmm, mmph…. Ha…”

As I focused on the act of exchanging saliva through our lips and tongues again, the lewd sensation once more began to swirl through my mind.

Even though he wasn’t touching me, and even though I wasn’t revealing my body to Ethan, the strange pleasure I felt every time our tongues and mucous membranes met made my head grow hotter with each passing moment.

-Drip.

‘How much longer is this going to go on….’

Even though I was becoming increasingly aware of a sensation that felt like something other than my mouth was getting wet, Ethan continued pressing his face close to mine. He kissed me so deeply that my head was almost buried into the soft mattress, leaving me with no way to escape.

Just when I was starting to worry that he might really kiss me until morning, Ethan’s lips slowly began to separate from mine. A thin string of saliva, a lewd symbol of our intense kiss, stretched between us as our lips parted after so long.

“…Ha, ha, ha….”

“……”

“…Are you… satisfied now?”

“……”

His expression was subtle. It seemed that his earlier anger had subsided somewhat, but there was still a hint of lingering regret.

And as I looked at his face, I couldn’t help but feel equally unsettled. The Ethan I knew would have let go of me by now, but today, he seemed far more persistent.

“…I’m worried that you might be misunderstanding something, so let me clarify.”

“……”

“As I said before, I have never kissed anyone else—no other man, or rather, no other person—besides you, Young Master Ethan.”

“…I know.”

“In other words, you’re currently the person closest to my heart, Young Master Ethan. Even after saying this, do you still need further proof?”

“……”

Ethan just stared at me, his face flushed, without saying a word, and I couldn’t help but feel the weight of his gaze.

He seemed to be conflicted, as if he wanted to say something but couldn’t. But at least in this moment, I could tell that he didn’t truly intend to harm me… probably.

Fortunately, my instincts were right. Hearing my sincere words, Ethan slowly loosened his grip on my wrists and began to move his body off mine.

“I’m sorry, Lillis.”

“……”

“I’m… I’m pathetic for having such strange thoughts. Even though I know in my head that you wouldn’t leave me for someone else by choice, I couldn’t help but doubt you because of my own insecurity.”

“…It’s alright.”

“I’m sorry for making you feel troubled when you’re already tired. I knew that doing something like this would only frighten you, but I couldn’t stop myself.”

“……”

‘You couldn’t stop yourself in the moment,’ huh….

It wasn’t the best apology, to be honest. This kind of excuse implied that something similar could happen again in the future.

But Ethan’s sudden behavior today, where he nearly crossed the line, was definitely unusual.

Until now, he had always been almost obsessively careful not to do anything that would make me uncomfortable, yet suddenly, he had become so aggressive. It was strange.

‘Wait, come to think of it….’

When was the last time I relieved Ethan’s sexual tension?

My most recent memory was at the end of the last semester when I sneaked out without telling him, and he punished me for it. That was the last time.

Before that, I had voluntarily rewarded him after he had his first ‘complete victory’ against Harold, giving him a reward in the bath. That was the last time I voluntarily offered anything.

Thinking about it, I couldn’t help but wonder if Ethan’s behavior tonight was due to pent-up sexual frustration that had suddenly exploded.

After all, I was the person he loved most, his lover (though only temporarily), and we shared a bed every night.

It wasn’t just sharing a bed; we were practically sharing our living space. Although we tried to be as discreet as possible to avoid embarrassing each other, there were times, maybe once or twice a month, when we accidentally saw each other changing clothes. We lived in such close proximity every day, both on weekdays and weekends.

Even with the winter break in between, Ethan and I had been living like this for almost half a year. Perhaps I hadn't been attentive enough to his needs, unintentionally tormenting him by being so close yet so distant for all this time.

His sudden attempt to take me by force might have been due to his pent-up sexual frustration reaching a breaking point.

‘…It looks like I have to take responsibility.’

If I simply brushed off his desires today, it might come back with even greater intensity later on. If that happened, there was a real risk that he might cross a line that neither of us wanted to cross.

And it wasn’t that Ethan’s skills had dulled recently or anything; it’s just that my standards for what constitutes a ‘reward’ had gotten higher.

So, if I decided to give him a little something now, Ethan probably wouldn’t find it strange. …Probably.

‘It’s not because I want to do this with Ethan…’

I’m just trying to soothe Ethan’s frustration and prevent any potential disasters from occurring because of it. There’s no selfish desire on my part at all.