But why was I holding the kitchen knife?

Get a grip.
This isn’t good.
Why was I holding the kitchen knife?
Was I going to stab someone?

Shihu?
Or the white-haired woman?

Hmm.
Cooking.
I was cooking, so maybe that's why I had it in my hand.

But the cooking finished hours ago, and there was nothing to chop with the knife.
So why was I holding it?
I need to snap out of this.
Why am I acting like this?

Maybe it's because I haven’t slept.
I haven’t slept.