My Beloved Concubine Only Wants to Eat Melons
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Chapter 45 Table of contents

With that sound, the two people in the palace finally came back to their senses.

Yanshu hurriedly broke free from Yuwen Lan's embrace, straightened her clothes, adjusted her hair, and rushed to the mirror to wipe off the smeared lipstick from his kisses.

After tidying herself up, she was about to go to the heated couch when her gaze inadvertently caught sight of a shocking scene.

His robe... seemed to be tented.

Yanshu was stunned, suddenly remembering the thing she had accidentally brushed against earlier...

Could this be...

She was suddenly filled with shock!!!

Had he recovered???

"..."

Yuwen Lan felt a bit awkward.

He desperately wanted to tell her that her guess was correct.

— If they hadn't been interrupted just now, he might have already carried her to the bed.

Tsk, why did the Empress Dowager have to pick such a moment to summon her?

Yanshu was also curious about this question.

What did the Empress Dowager want with her out of the blue?

Could it be that she wanted to inquire about novels again while the Emperor was present?

Of course, the Empress Dowager's messenger was waiting outside, and she should have called them in to inquire.

However, looking at a certain someone's proud and majestic appearance...

Tsk, how could they receive visitors like this?

Unable to resist taking another peek, Yanshu clicked her tongue inwardly. Even from this view it looked quite impressive; it seemed the Emperor had quite some potential.

Yuwen Lan, "..."

Of course, after all, he was the Emperor.

Just as he was thinking this, he saw Yanshu quickly fetch a blanket from inside and say to him, "It's suddenly gotten a bit cold in the room. Your Majesty must not catch a chill."

With that, she blushed and draped the blanket over his body.

Only then did she call out to the door, "Come in and speak."

As soon as she finished, the palace maid guarding the door lifted the curtain and ushered in Zhu Shu, who had been waiting outside to report.

Entering the hall, Zhu Shu immediately sensed an ambiguous atmosphere swirling around.

Her heart skipped a beat, but she could only first bow to the two of them, "This servant pays respects to Your Majesty and Consort Yi."

After speaking, she secretly glanced at the two of them, noticing Yanshu's rosy cheeks and the Emperor's somewhat unnatural expression.

Combined with how long she had been waiting at the door...

The scene that had just unfolded in the hall was self-evident.

She could only pretend not to have noticed anything and reported to the two of them, "The Empress Dowager wishes to invite Consort Yi over for a chat. If it's convenient for Your Majesty, perhaps you'd like to join as well."

Yanshu thought to herself that this was well said, as the Emperor probably wasn't quite in a convenient state at the moment.

Yuwen Lan, "..."

Indeed, he had been feeling quite uncomfortable just now.

However, after this interruption, he had already calmed down...

Ah, this was the first time in three years!

He barely suppressed his disappointment and said with a normal expression, "I was just thinking of going to visit Mother. Let's go then."

With that, he removed the blanket from his body and rose from the couch.

What, he was going too?

Yanshu was startled and quickly glanced again, but saw that he had already returned to normal.

Gone again???

She couldn't help but worry — would this have any effect on him?

Would he become impotent again...

Yuwen Lan, "..."

It hadn't quite come to that.

It's just... his heart was filled with a deep, indescribable regret.

Tsk, the Empress Dowager really knew how to pick her moments!

Not long after, the two of them arrived together at the Palace of Benevolent Peace.

After paying their respects, the Empress Dowager called for tea and snacks to be served, then smiled and said, "I woke up from my afternoon nap with nothing to do and wanted to call Consort Yi over for a chat. I didn't expect Your Majesty to be here as well?"

Yuwen Lan said, "I had just gone over not long ago, and thought to come visit Mother together. How have you been feeling these past few days?"

The Empress Dowager nodded, "Thanks to Your Majesty's blessings, I've been quite well these past few days. But I heard that Consort Yi hasn't been feeling well lately. Are you feeling better now?"

Hearing this, Yanshu couldn't help but glance at the Emperor.

She was covering for him after all!

— With Ganlu Palace brewing medicine for over ten days now, everyone outside thought it was she who had fallen ill.

She could only reply to the Empress Dowager, "Thank you for your concern, Empress Dowager. I just caught a slight cold a few days ago. After drinking medicine for a few days, I'm almost fully recovered now."

As she finished speaking, she hurriedly covered her mouth and coughed twice to prove she wasn't lying.

She pondered in her heart that this explanation should be fine. Judging from today's situation, it seemed the Emperor no longer needed to take medicine.

Hearing this, Yuwen Lan silently nodded in his heart —

Indeed, based on what happened earlier, he should no longer need to take medicine.

Ahem, he'd find an opportunity to prove it to her tonight.

Just as his mind started to wander, he saw the Empress Dowager nod, "That's good then."

But then she suddenly changed the subject and asked, "Speaking of which, I've been reading novels in my free time these past few days. I noticed that in the latest book by the Carefree Gentleman, he seems to be writing about the Chai family, doesn't he?"

At these words, Yanshu thought to herself that as expected, the Empress Dowager had come to inquire about novels again.

Well, she was covering for the Emperor by pretending to take medicine, and the Emperor was covering for her about the novels. They were even now.

She quietly picked up her teacup and took a sip, secretly glancing at the Emperor, waiting for him to answer.

Yuwen Lan, "..."

This "even" situation was quite unfair.

After all, he only had to take medicine this one time, but she had already written many novels.

And in the future, she would likely continue writing endlessly.

However, since he had agreed to this himself, he said, "Mother is correct."

The Empress Dowager nodded and continued, "How did Your Majesty discover that Chai Weizhong was homosexual? I had no idea about this all along."

Yuwen Lan could only say, "I heard about it by chance and had someone investigate. It turned out to be true."

The Empress Dowager nodded again.

But in her heart, she wondered, [Where exactly did he hear it from? How come I never heard anything about it!]

Yuwen Lan, "..."

Next, the Empress Dowager sighed, "This Chai Weizhong is too outrageous. Being homosexual is one thing, but to actually bring a man home and pass him off as a concubine! Such disrespect for his lawful wife, it's truly infuriating."

Yuwen Lan could only say, "Those with wicked hearts often commit deeds that defy heaven's principles. However, he has now been brought to justice, so Mother need not dwell on it anymore."

The Empress Dowager made a sound of agreement, "It's fortunate that Your Majesty has such keen insight and discernment."

But in her heart, she shook her head, [It should have been exposed earlier, letting him suffer disgrace and the contempt of thousands before being brought to justice. That would have been truly satisfying! The Emperor is still not ruthless enough.]

Yuwen Lan, "..."

Alright, he understood now. Indeed, women found this scoundrel's behavior utterly unforgivable.

Then he heard the Empress Dowager continue, "By the way, I've heard rumors lately that the first person to discover something amiss with that human trafficker surnamed Hu and report him to the authorities was a woman. Does Your Majesty know if this is true or false? I wonder which young lady it was, to be so clever and brave?"

Yuwen Lan, "...I've only just heard about this matter and haven't been able to verify it yet."

Well, after being mother and son for over twenty years, he was only now discovering that the Empress Dowager also enjoyed gossip so much.

At this moment, he heard Yanshu say from the side, "This consort believes this claim is very likely to be true."

"Oh?"

The Empress Dowager immediately looked at her, "Why does Consort Yi say so?"

Yanshu smiled and said, "If this consort may be so bold, women have been underestimated since ancient times. We are rarely involved in important matters. Most good deeds are attributed to men. Now that the common people unanimously believe this was done by a young woman, it's likely to be true. Otherwise, wouldn't they have already claimed it was a man?"

"Well reasoned," the Empress Dowager nodded. "For once, the men aren't trying to take credit. It must indeed have been a woman's doing."

[This little Consort Yi has some insight. She's different from those who think they're clever.]

Yuwen Lan, "..."

As the only man present in the hall at this moment, he suddenly felt a sense of exclusion.

So he spoke up, "In another half month, it will be Mother's birthday celebration. I have already ordered the Court of Imperial Sacrifices and the Court of Imperial Entertainments to begin preparations. Does Mother wish to hold it in the palace this year, or would you prefer Jinbo Garden?"

— Rather than letting the Empress Dowager continue asking strange questions, it was better to actively change the subject.

Sure enough, the Empress Dowager smiled and said, "I am already content with Your Majesty's filial piety. The palace will do fine. Let's keep everything simple and not burden the people or waste resources."

Yuwen Lan nodded and continued, "The other day, I received a report that Duke Qin'an and his family are already on their way. They should arrive in the capital in about five or six days. You and Aunt haven't seen each other in a long time, so you'll be able to have a good chat."

The Duchess of Qin'an was the Empress Dowager's cousin. As a noble lady of the Zhou family, she had married the Marquis of Qin'an years ago. Later, when the previous emperor ascended the throne, in order to show his regard for the Zhou family and win over the Marquis of Qin'an's influence, he elevated her husband to the position of duke.

However, this family resided in the northwest and only returned annually for the Empress Dowager's birthday celebrations.

It was thought that the sisters must have a deep affection for each other.

Hearing this, the Empress Dowager nodded and smiled, "Your Majesty is truly considerate."

But inwardly she sighed, "I have to see that annoying Zhou Shulan again."

Yuwen Lan: "???"

After discussing the Thousand Autumn Festival, a minister happened to request an audience at Qianming Palace, so Yuwen Lan left the Palace of Benevolent Peace with Yanshu.

Yanshu returned to Ganlu Palace to write her stories.

After meeting with the minister, seeing that it was still early, Yuwen Lan changed into casual clothes and left the palace.

— Today happened to be Jiang Nianqi's day off, so he wanted to ask if he could now be considered fully recovered.

It wasn't long before he arrived at his destination.

At that time, Doctor Jiang was seeing another patient, so he waited in the carriage for a while. When the room was empty, he got out of the carriage with his veil.

Upon entering the room, Doctor Jiang saw him and asked, "Has the treatment been effective, sir?"

Yuwen Lan inwardly sighed at the doctor's medical skills and nodded, "Indeed. Today I discovered that I seem to have returned to normal. So, is it no longer necessary to continue taking medicine?"

Doctor Jiang nodded, "You don't need to take medicine anymore, but sir, you still can't engage in sexual activities yet."

What?

Yuwen Lan was stunned and quickly asked, "Why not?"

The doctor replied, "Sir, you weren't poisoned for just a day or two. Although the residual toxins have mostly been expelled from your body, your vital energy has been suppressed for so long that it's not in optimal condition. In this situation, if you were to engage in sexual activities and your partner became pregnant, there's a risk of an unhealthy child or even a stillbirth."

Yuwen Lan drew in a sharp breath and frowned, "Is it really that serious?"

Doctor Jiang nodded, "I'm not exaggerating. I've traveled to many places and seen numerous such cases. For the sake of your future offspring, it's best to abstain for now."

Yuwen Lan asked again, "How long must I wait?"

Doctor Jiang said, "Vital energy regenerates in cycles of three days. You should wait for seven cycles, which is about right."

Three days per cycle, and seven cycles...

Yuwen Lan paused. That meant twenty-one days.

In other words, he had to wait another month?

Seemingly noticing his disappointment, Doctor Jiang consoled him, "Sir, you've waited this long, surely a few more days won't make much difference."

Yuwen Lan: "..."

What did he mean by a few more days not making a difference?

It was one thing when he wasn't better, but now that he had recovered...

Especially when every night, that young lady beside him was restless and liked to snuggle into his arms.

It was like a traveler who had been trekking through the desert for a long time, holding a sweet, fresh fruit but unable to eat it.

It was absolute torture!

He wasn't willing to give up and tried asking again, "Is there no other way?"

Doctor Jiang said, "Another option... would be to have the lady drink contraceptive tea. However, all medicine has its side effects. If she drinks too much of this tea, it could make it difficult for her to conceive in the future."

Yuwen Lan paused.

He had just barely recovered to normal...

Alright, he nodded and said, "Thank you for your explanation, doctor."

He then took out a gold ingot from his sleeve, placed it on the table, and said, "This is my consultation fee."

Jiang Nianqi was about to speak, but Yuwen Lan added, "This is a token of my appreciation. Please don't refuse."

After saying this, he stood up and left the room.

Jiang Nianqi watched his retreating figure for a while before reluctantly putting away the gold ingot.

Well, this man had such a strong presence that he was clearly no ordinary person, so he had better comply.

However...

It was somewhat surprising —

Men of his status usually had wives and concubines, or even spent their days in debauchery with countless women around them.

Yet when this man heard that the contraceptive tea could be harmful to women, he didn't pursue it further. Could it be that he only had one woman in his household?

It was rare to find such a faithful man.

By the time he returned to the palace, it was already dark.

Yuwen Lan changed his clothes in Qianming Palace, then went to the study to look over some memorials. When he finally went to Ganlu Palace, Yanshu had already bathed.

Seeing him arrive, she hurried forward to pay her respects, "This humble consort greets Your Majesty."

Yuwen Lan excused her from the formalities and looked down at her.

Her long, wet hair hung down her back, with a few strands clinging to her temples. Her cheeks were flushed from the warm bath, making her look like a delicious fruit on a branch.

Yes, exactly the kind of fruit that he, a long-distance traveler, very much wanted to taste.

Yuwen Lan tried hard to banish the distracting thoughts from his mind and said, "It's late, let's sleep."

He then went to the bed.

Yanshu responded and followed him to the bed.

However, after lying down, she felt a bit restless.

— Based on what happened during the day, he should be better now.

So tonight...

Would they...

Ahem, if it really happened, she shouldn't be too shy.

After all, he was just recovering from a serious illness and needed encouragement. It wouldn't do to extinguish the small flame that had just begun to spark.

Yuwen Lan: "???"

So this was what she was thinking?

He had thought she would be shy or even resistant...

But then again, thinking back to when he first came to Ganlu Palace, she had dared to kiss him on her own initiative.

Thinking of this, he began to feel a bit restless again.

However...

Yuwen Lan silently sighed. Tonight he could only disappoint her.

So he turned his back to her, facing the bed curtains, and closed his eyes, silently reciting a mantra to calm his mind.

Yanshu: "???"

What did this mean?

The person who always took advantage of her every time they slept was now turning his back to her?

Hadn't he recovered???

After puzzling over this for a while, she suddenly paused.

Damn, could it be that he was thinking of another woman?

Yuwen Lan: "???"

Then he heard her think, [Tsk tsk, it must be like this. After all, I'm just his target practice. When he couldn't perform, he used me as a cover. Now that he can, he continues to use me as a cover, but saves his virginity for his true love!]

Yes, it must be like this!

Yuwen Lan: "???"

True love?

The only one he liked was her.

However, before he could open his mouth to explain, he heard her curse again, [Scumbag!]

Yuwen Lan: "???"

How had he become a scumbag???

At this moment, Yanshu was inexplicably irritated —

...Although he hadn't played with her body or feelings, she somehow felt that he was very scummy.

But anyway, she hadn't fallen for him either, she had just coveted his good looks a little...

Who's afraid of whom!

So she also turned to face the inside of the bed, back-to-back with him.

Yuwen Lan: "???"

What, she hadn't fallen for him?

And only coveted his good looks???

Just then, he heard several more "scumbag" curses from her mind...

Yuwen Lan: "..."

He had no choice but to turn back towards her and pull her into his arms.

However, the moment he touched her, he could feel her wanting to resist.

He said, "Are you angry with me?"

Yanshu woodenly said she wasn't.

Yuwen Lan raised an eyebrow and said, "Then why do you look so sulky?"

Yanshu wanted to tell him she wasn't, but as soon as she turned her head, she accidentally fell into his kiss.

Mmm...

She had meant to resist, but got lost for a moment.

After all, he... was getting better at this.

However, her mind was still thinking, this scumbag wasn't saving his virginity for his true love? Why was he kissing her again?

What virginity...

Yuwen Lan reluctantly parted from her and said softly, "Silly girl."

Yanshu: "???"

What?

This scumbag was calling her silly???

But then she saw him sigh again and say, "I've been unwell these past few days, so I've been taking medicine."

Yanshu made a sound of acknowledgment.

In her heart, she wondered why he was suddenly telling her this.

Then she heard him continue, "The doctor told me that I can't... be intimate with you for a few days."

After all, it was his first time discussing such matters with a woman, so he felt somewhat uncomfortable.

The young lady in his arms was stunned. "Ah?"

What was this situation?

Was it because he had just recovered and couldn't do that yet?

So it wasn't that he was saving his virginity for his true love?

Just then, she heard him say, "You're the only one in my heart. There's never been anyone else."

Yanshu was taken aback.

...Why was he suddenly saying this?

It was as if he knew what she was thinking...

Then, she saw him add with resignation, "That's why I turned away to sleep, because as soon as I hold you, I... can't control myself."

Yanshu was stunned again. "Is... that so?"

Before he could respond, she had already felt it.

Tsk...

So that was the case.

...He must be very uncomfortable, right?

Yuwen Lan wanted to say yes.

He was in a difficult situation!!!

Heaven knows what torment he was enduring at that moment?

Suddenly, the girl in his arms asked, "Did the doctor say if there are any other methods that could work?"

"What?"

Yuwen Lan didn't understand.

What other methods?

Then he saw her reach out her hand.

And without warning, he was touched by me, his whole body trembling with inheritance.

Yanshu blinked her innocent big eyes and asked, "Would this work?"

Yuwen Lan didn't know what to say anymore, and could only mumble, "Y-yes, I suppose..."

In the next moment, he could barely protect his knees.

...

That night, Yuwen Lan had the best sleep he'd had since ascending to the throne.

It was truly good.

Five days later, Duke Qin'an's family arrived in the capital.

As this was the Empress Dowager's clan sister, who had come specifically for the Empress Dowager's birthday celebration, the Empress Dowager naturally couldn't neglect them. Early the next morning, she had people escort her elder sister, the Duchess of Qin'an, to the palace for a meeting.

Yanshu, as one of the few remaining consorts in the palace, accompanied the Empress Dowager along with Consort Zhou to receive the guests in the Palace of Benevolent Peace.

She had just arrived at the Palace of Benevolent Peace when she saw the Duchess of Qin'an enter the hall.

Behind her followed two younger women and five or six children, ranging from seven or eight years old to two or three, with even one being carried in arms, not yet able to walk. There were both boys and girls, making for a very lively scene.

The Duchess of Qin'an appeared to be three or four years older than the Empress Dowager, but her countenance seemed even more stern.

Yanshu thought to herself that this woman truly lived up to being the elder sister from childhood; her aura clearly showed she was the head of the family.

It must not be easy to be her daughter-in-law, she mused.

After the Duchess of Qin'an led her large family to pay their respects, Yanshu learned that the two younger women were her daughter-in-law Lady Yue and her daughter Lady Qiao. The children were her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

My, what a lively family indeed.

The Empress Dowager had seats brought for all of them and ordered palace servants to bring tea and refreshments. She then began to make small talk with her elder sister.

"It's been a year since we last met. Have you been well, sister?" the Empress Dowager politely inquired.

The Duchess of Qin'an nodded, "Thanks to Your Majesty's blessings, I've been well. Last year we welcomed a new grandson, who is now over seven months old. By next year when we visit again, he'll be able to kowtow to Your Majesty."

The Empress Dowager nodded with a smile, "Your family is prosperous with many descendants. You are truly blessed, sister."

But then the Duchess of Qin'an asked, "I wonder if there have been any new little masters or mistresses in the palace?"

Upon hearing this, everyone froze.

This... wasn't this bringing up a sore subject?

What the Empress Dowager wanted most now was an imperial grandson. If there had been one, wouldn't she have already shown him off?

Yanshu also inwardly clicked her tongue—

Was there some unpleasantness between these sisters?

If the palace had welcomed a prince or princess, it would have been announced to the whole world. How could she not know and still ask about it?

This Duchess of Qin'an didn't seem like a fool, so why was she deliberately jabbing at the Empress Dowager's sore spot?

Suddenly, Yanshu heard a ding from her system, [That's right, these sisters have been competing and fighting since childhood, neither submitting to the other. The elder sister married the Marquis of Qin'an back then, thinking she had surpassed her younger sister, but she never expected the Empress Dowager to later marry the late emperor, putting her back down again. However, after the Empress Dowager's eldest son died young, this elder sister thought she had won over the Empress Dowager.]

Yanshu clicked her tongue upon hearing this, [No wonder she brought up her grandson right away. This is a fatal blow! Isn't she afraid the Empress Dowager will deal with her?]

The system sighed, [The Empress Dowager is indeed very annoyed by this elder sister, but she has no choice. If she were to move against her, the Zhou family would lose another supporter. For the sake of family interests, she has to endure it.]

Yanshu sighed at this, thinking that the Empress Dowager was truly not having an easy time, surrounded by such unhelpful people.

But this Duchess of Qin'an was also too much. No matter how much they competed, the Empress Dowager was still their support, and there was still a layer of kinship. How could she use someone's most painful matter to stab at their heart?

The system sighed again, [This woman has always been like this. It's precisely because she's too harsh and domineering that her relationship with Duke Qin'an has never been good. Her son is also weak, not daring to intervene even though he knows his wife is having an affair with a servant in the household.]

Yanshu, [There's even such an interesting story???]

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