My Beloved Concubine Only Wants to Eat Melons
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Chapter 46 Table of contents

Upon hearing the system's words, Yanshu immediately glanced at Lady Yue, who was sitting obediently beside the Duchess of Qin'an.

[You're saying it's this Lady Yue who's fooling around with the servants?]

The system replied, [The Duchess of Qin'an gave birth to one son and one daughter. The son is Qiao Yongkang, the heir of Qin'an Duke, and he married Lady Yue. Who else could it be?]

Yanshu asked again, [But, but, her husband is at least the heir, and his body has no problems. Why would she fool around with servants?]

— Tsk, back then Lady Yang, who had an affair with her father-in-law, the Minister of Rites, did so because her husband was in poor health. She got involved with her father-in-law to secure benefits for herself.

But this Lady Yue is already in such a high position, why bother fooling around with servants?

The system explained, [The heir of Qin'an Duke was raised too strictly by his mother since childhood. As a result, he grew up lacking ambition, incompetent in both civil and military affairs, but obsessed with carpentry. He spends all day tinkering with wood, and is as dull as a log, with no sense of romance. He's also round and fat. Lady Yue can't stand him. As it happens, there's a tall, handsome coachman in the household who knows how to charm women. Lady Yue couldn't resist the loneliness and had an affair.]

So it was the coachman.

Yanshu suddenly understood.

After thinking for a moment, she asked again, [But how does she manage to have an affair? The Qin'an Duke's mansion is full of people, and she has such a formidable mother-in-law as the Duchess. How does she find the opportunity?]

The system sighed, [As they say, where there's a will, there's a way. Lady Yue is very good at pleasing her mother-in-law. Plus, her husband is the Duchess's only son, so naturally, she's valued. The Duchess entrusts many household affairs to her. When Lady Yue goes out to inspect the farms, check on the shops, or attend social events, doesn't she always ride in a carriage?]

Carriage?

Yanshu couldn't help but exclaim, what a convenient carriage!

These two even have a ready-made place, how convenient indeed.

After her exclamation, she asked again, [So how did her husband find out about her affair with the coachman?]

The system explained, [That Qiao Yongkang, the heir of Qin'an Duke, likes to work with wood, right? Over the years, he's made all the beds, wardrobes, tables, and chairs in the house. Now he's started repairing things. One time, he heard that his wife's carriage was broken, so he personally took his tools to check it out. To his surprise, he discovered that the axle was broken.]

[You should know, the axles of the carriages in the Qin'an Duke's mansion are all made of the best elm wood, extremely hard. How could it break so easily? It must have been subjected to great impacts over a long period to break.]

What?

Long-term great impacts!

Yanshu's eyes lit up again.

[Tsk tsk tsk, it seems this coachman has great stamina. No wonder Lady Yue wanted to have an affair... Then what?]

The system continued, [Qiao Yongkang may be obsessed with carpentry, but he's not stupid. He's also an expert in the field, so he naturally noticed something was wrong. The next time his wife went out, he secretly had someone follow her, and that's how he discovered it.]

Yanshu silently gasped, then asked, [And then?]

The system replied, [Nothing much after that. If there was, would the Duchess of Qin'an still be bragging about her daughter-in-law in front of the Empress Dowager today?]

Tsk, that's true. Judging from today's situation, it's clear that the Duchess of Qin'an is still unaware.

Just then, the Empress Dowager, who had been stung by her elder cousin's words, smiled faintly and said, [The palace is still the same as before. I don't have your good fortune.]

The Duchess of Qin'an then said, "I wouldn't dare say so, Your Majesty. It's just that your destined match hasn't arrived yet. Besides, what fortune do I have? It's just that my son Yongkang is lucky to have married a good wife."

After speaking, she glanced at Lady Yue and introduced her to the Empress Dowager, "Last year, Yongkang's wife was heavily pregnant, and I didn't dare let her travel on the bumpy roads, so we left her at home. She couldn't come to wish Your Majesty a happy birthday in person. Now that the child has been born, I've brought her along."

Then she instructed Lady Yue, "Quickly, come and pay your respects to the Empress Dowager."

Hearing this, Yanshu pondered in her heart—

[...So Lady Yue didn't come last year? Goodness, with no one watching at home, didn't she go wild?]

The system replied, [Not really, she was pregnant at that time.]

Yanshu, [That's true...]

Wait a minute!

She suddenly realized a problem—

When did Lady Yue start her affair with the coachman?

The Duchess of Qin'an had personally introduced earlier that among this bunch of children, the seven-year-old boy Qiao Wanheng, the five-year-old girl Qiao Nianrou, and the youngest baby were her grandchildren.

In other words, all three were born to Lady Yue.

So... how many of them were actually the heir's?

The system said, [Although Lady Yue fooled around, she's not stupid. She used sheepskin condoms every time, so all three children are still the heir Qiao Yongkang's.]

What?

Yanshu once again accurately grasped the key point, [Sheepskin condoms? There's such a thing?]

Tsk tsk tsk, this is truly eye-opening!

The system explained, [Sheepskin condoms are quite common. Many people use them in this era, but they're not very hygienic. There's a risk of catching some disease or something.]

Yanshu, "..."

Maybe it's better to forget about that...

Just then, Lady Yue, hearing her mother-in-law's words, stood up and came before the Empress Dowager to pay her respects properly.

"I wasn't able to personally wish Your Majesty a happy birthday last year. I hope Your Majesty will forgive me. I humbly wish Your Majesty blessings as vast as the Eastern Sea and longevity as enduring as the Southern Mountains."

The Empress Dowager nodded with a smile, "Good child, truly graceful and virtuous, very much in the style of your mother-in-law."

Hearing this, Lady Yue quickly lowered her head in gratitude and said, "These years, I've been blessed with mother-in-law's deep love, treating me like her own daughter. I've taken all of mother-in-law's earnest teachings to heart."

Yanshu, "..."

Tsk tsk tsk, the Empress Dowager's words were actually meant to mock her elder cousin, but this heir's wife sure knows how to seize an opportunity!

No wonder she can win her mother-in-law's favor.

But come to think of it...

She felt that the Duchess of Qin'an's praising of her daughter-in-law today wasn't simply to show off to the Empress Dowager.

Could there be something else?

Just as she was thinking this, the youngest baby of the Qiao family suddenly started crying, rubbing his eyes and kicking his legs in a very fussy manner.

The Empress Dowager said, "Is the child tired? It's not easy for little ones to travel such a long way to the capital with adults. Let's end here for today. Quickly, take the little one back to rest."

Everyone agreed, stood up together to bow and bid farewell, and finally dispersed.

Returning to Ganlu Palace, it was nearly noon.

Yanshu changed her clothes, had lunch, and without even taking an afternoon nap, hurriedly sat at the table to write her story—

It would be a waste not to write about such an interesting material she had obtained today.

She was fully immersed and extremely focused, even having dinner in a hurry.

When night fell and Yuwen Lan entered the hall, he saw that she was still writing.

Yuwen Lan asked curiously, "What story have you written today? You seem so engrossed?"

Could something he didn't know about have happened again?

Yanshu was just wanting to share with him, and upon hearing his question, she immediately said, "Today, I wrote a story called 'The Flirtatious Wife Loses Her Golden Husband'."

Hm?

Yuwen Lan raised an eyebrow and said, "'Flirtatious wife' refers to a fickle woman?"

Yanshu nodded, "That's right."

He nodded slightly, "This kind of theme seems quite novel. What's it about?"

Yanshu cleared her throat and said, "This is a story about a male protagonist's counterattack."

Just as she said this, Yuwen Lan had another question.

He could guess that "male protagonist" referred to the main male character in the story.

But what did "counterattack" mean?

So he asked her, "What does 'counterattack' mean?"

Yanshu explained, "Counterattack refers to — someone who was originally in an adverse or disadvantaged situation, struggles upward, breaks free from constraints, and finally surpasses others to become the winner."

Yuwen Lan nodded, "This expression is indeed quite novel."

After saying this, he didn't ask any more questions, just waiting for her to continue.

Yanshu then said, "The story is about a young master, born into wealth, but with a calm and leisurely nature. Unfortunately, his family had high expectations for him, forcing him to do things he didn't like. The young master was full of bitterness from childhood to adulthood, but didn't dare to disobey his parents. He could only engage in handicrafts to express his inner sorrow."

"As he reached marriageable age, his parents carefully selected a seemingly virtuous and proper young woman for him. Being naive by nature, after marriage, the young master treated his wife with respect and kindness. However, his wife had actually married him for his family's power and influence, not out of genuine affection."

Yuwen Lan nodded, "Men pursuing women for their beauty, and women pursuing men for their power - these are common occurrences."

Yanshu continued, "Shortly after the marriage, his wife gave birth to a son and a daughter. The young master was overjoyed to become a father and lovingly crafted many toys for the children to play with. However, what was meant to be fatherly affection was seen by his wife as a lack of ambition. Gradually, she even began an affair with one of the household servants."

Yuwen Lan: "???"

This was an unexpected turn of events.

He had assumed the woman would be like the former Linwu Marquis's wife, associating with various wealthy and powerful men. How did it end up being a servant?

He couldn't help but ask, "What was so appealing about this servant that made her betray her husband?"

Yanshu replied, "This servant had a silver tongue and was very skilled at manipulating women's emotions. Most importantly, he had a good physique that could satisfy the woman's needs."

At first, Yuwen Lan didn't quite understand. He frowned and said, "A good physique... is that really a reason? Was the husband's physique not good?"

Yanshu nodded firmly, "Of course a good physique is important. That servant had broad shoulders, a slim waist, and six-pack abs. In comparison, the young master had been plump since childhood and would get out of breath doing any physical labor..."

Yuwen Lan: "..."

So that's what "physical labor" meant.

He finally understood that women placed such importance on this...

At the same time, he became curious - who exactly was this story about?

Just as he was pondering this, he heard her thoughts: [I wonder what that coachman from the Qin'an Duke's household looks like? Driving carriages all day, he's probably not fair-skinned, but more of a tanned and muscular type.]

Yuwen Lan: "???"

The Qin'an Duke's household?

...Alright, he probably knew who it was now.

Just this morning, Qiao Beiwang, the Duke of Qin'an, had brought his son and son-in-law to pay respects to him. Wasn't his son Qiao Yongkang quite plump?

So it was about them.

Tsk, was that family really so chaotic?

However, the Qin'an Duke's family had just arrived in the capital. How did she already know such secrets?

He asked, "Then what? Did the husband find out his wife was having an affair?"

She nodded, "He did find out, but because of his weak nature, he didn't dare expose it. He just covered his eyes and pretended not to know, continuing to live as before."

Yuwen Lan: "???"

What a character, to be able to endure even this.

"What happened next?"

Yanshu continued, "At first, this young master allowed the two to carry on their affair in the household, still fantasizing that his wife would one day come to her senses. However, little did he know that the two were no longer satisfied with the status quo and wanted to be together forever. So they plotted to poison the entire family."

"It was only at this point that the young master realized that tolerance was not the answer. He finally fought back, killing the adulterer, divorcing his wife, and dealing with all the servants who had helped the two cover up their affair. Afterwards, he turned over a new leaf, dedicating himself to learning from others, and even found time to exercise, shedding his excess fat and regaining his handsome appearance."

"When the ex-wife saw that her former husband had transformed into a handsome gentleman, she instantly regretted her actions and foolishly hoped to reconcile with him. However, by then the young master no longer wanted her. She could only end up homeless on the streets, living a miserable life."

The story ended there.

Yuwen Lan nodded, "The ending is quite satisfying. It's your style."

But as soon as he finished speaking, he realized another issue -

He remembered that the Qin'an Duke's heir had two sons and one daughter, right?

So he tentatively asked, "Whose children were they?"

Yanshu coughed, "Let's just say they were his. After all, he had raised them for so many years and developed feelings for them. It's best not to involve the children."

Tsk tsk, this point should be based on facts.

After all, if the story is published and the truth comes to light one day, it would be terrible if the Qiao family were to take out their anger on the innocent children.

Yuwen Lan silently listened, thinking to himself that the children must indeed be Qiao Yongkang's.

Tsk, it's still too messy!

After pondering for a while, he felt a bit scared.

Fortunately, he wasn't round and fat. In the future, he must remember to always maintain his physical fitness.

Just as he was thinking this, he saw Yanshu yawn in front of him, her almond eyes welling up with tears.

Yuwen Lan said, "Write more tomorrow."

He coughed and added with a meaningful gaze, "It's late, we should sleep."

Yanshu was taken aback.

...If we're going to sleep, why say it in such an ambiguous way?

Tsk, could it be that he... wants to again?

Yuwen Lan, who had secretly heard her thoughts, coughed and said in a low voice, "I'll go bathe first."

After speaking, he held back the redness threatening to spread to his ears and turned to enter the bathroom.

Yanshu: "..."

She could only silently look at her delicate hands and sigh helplessly.

Tsk, if she had known earlier, she wouldn't have let him know about this method.

There were still more than ten days left, how long it seemed!

Since the Qin'an Duke's family were imperial relatives who had come from afar, and they were the first batch of guests to arrive in the capital for the Empress Dowager's birthday celebration, the palace held a welcoming banquet for the whole family the next day.

This family was considered part of the external relatives, and with both men and women present, they could not sit in the same hall.

However, before the banquet began, they entered the palace and needed to pay their respects to the Empress Dowager, the Emperor, and the imperial consorts.

Everyone saw that apart from the old couple of the Duke of Qin'an, their eldest son and daughter, daughter-in-law, son-in-law, and grandchildren who had come to pay respects yesterday, there was a new face today.

It was a young woman, about seventeen or eighteen years old, whose features somewhat resembled those of Lady Yue, the wife of the Duke of Qin'an's heir.

After everyone had paid their respects, the Duchess of Qin'an brought this girl forward and said to the Emperor and Empress Dowager, "This is Yongkang's wife's younger sister from her maiden family. Knowing that her sister would have difficulty managing three children on this trip to the capital, she voluntarily came along to help. Yesterday, when we first entered the palace, I was afraid she might be unfamiliar with the surroundings, so I didn't dare bring her along. Today, I've boldly brought her to pay respects to the Empress Dowager, Your Majesty, and all the imperial consorts."

She then instructed the young girl, "Quickly pay your respects to the noble ones."

The Yue family girl immediately stepped forward and bowed, saying, "This commoner pays respects to Your Majesty, to the Empress Dowager, and to all the imperial consorts."

Her voice was sweet and delicate, like a painted oriole from a book.

Looking at her appearance, she did indeed have some charm.

Seeing this scene, everyone pondered inwardly.

The younger sister of the daughter-in-law's maiden family? This relationship wasn't particularly close.

Moreover, couldn't the Duke of Qin'an's household afford to hire a wet nurse? Why bring an unmarried young girl to help take care of the children?

Yanshu inwardly clicked her tongue -

No wonder the Duchess of Qin'an had been praising her daughter-in-law so much yesterday. So this was her attempt to place someone in the palace.

By elevating the elder sister, wouldn't the younger sister from the same family naturally attract attention?

However, if that was the case, her offending the Empress Dowager was quite peculiar.

The Empress Dowager probably wouldn't like this Yue family girl either, considering her sister's behavior.

Sure enough, the Empress Dowager nodded slightly, but then smiled and said, "For an unmarried young lady to help others take care of children is indeed quite a burden on you."

The Yue family girl hesitated slightly, then could only say, "Being able to help my sister is what I should do."

In her heart, she thought, [Hmph, if I didn't come, how would I be able to see His Majesty? Oh my, His Majesty is even more handsome than the rumors say!]

[But those three consorts behind him... Never mind, I've heard that Consort Zhou has long fallen out of favor, and that Consort Wang who keeps night watch has become a laughingstock in the palace. The remaining one must be Noble Consort Yi.]

Thinking this, she secretly glanced at Yanshu with her peripheral vision, thinking, [She doesn't seem all that impressive. I've heard her family background isn't even as good as our Yue family. She definitely won't be my rival in the future.]

Yuwen Lan, who had been silently listening, thought: "???"

What future?

Where did this confidence come from?

Next, he heard the Duchess of Qin'an thinking, [Zhou Ruolan has no one left by her side who can be of use. If she's smart, she should take this girl into the palace and groom her well. After all, she has some connection to the Zhou family, which is still better than that Noble Consort Yi.]

Yuwen Lan just wanted to scoff.

No wonder the Empress Dowager said she was annoying.

He tried to listen to the Empress Dowager's thoughts and heard her secretly laughing coldly.

[What kind of dream is Zhou Shulan having? Trying to place someone right under my nose, does she think I'm stupid? Haha.]

Yuwen Lan felt slightly relieved. Thankfully, the Empress Dowager didn't think that way.

After paying their respects, the men and women went to their respective banquet halls.

As the Duke of the Northwest, Duke Qin'an held an extraordinary status. Apart from being personally entertained by the Emperor, several ministers from the court were also present at the banquet to accompany him.

Perhaps due to their familial connection, the ministers quickly noticed that the monarch was particularly warm towards Duke Qin'an's family tonight.

They couldn't help but actively invite Duke Qin'an to drink, expressing their concern for the hardships of guarding the Northwest in their conversations, and showing extra care for Duke Qin'an's heir, Qiao Yongkang.

For instance, after two rounds of drinks, the monarch proactively inquired, "Cousin Yongkang, what have you been busy with these past few years?"

This question caused everyone to pause.

— Did His Majesty just address him as 'cousin'?

Naturally, Qiao Yongkang himself was even more surprised by this honor. He hurriedly stood up and said, "Your humble servant is unworthy. I have achieved nothing in these years, truly failing to deserve Your Majesty's concern."

As soon as he finished speaking, Duke Qin'an also hastily added, "He has never had much ambition, making himself a laughingstock before Your Majesty."

This was indeed the truth. Hearing this, the ministers all shook their heads inwardly —

The first Marquis of Qin'an was once a renowned military general, ennobled for his numerous battle achievements and tasked with guarding the Northwest for the imperial court. Later, his son was fortunate enough to marry the Empress Dowager's cousin, conveniently elevating their status to Duke. By Qiao Yongkang's generation, they had lost all their capabilities.

It was said that he was completely oblivious to the affairs of the world, only interested in woodworking. He was truly an oddity among the sons of noble families.

However, at this moment, the monarch spoke up, "Do not belittle yourself. I've heard your craftsmanship is excellent. This too requires skill and attention to detail. Without sufficient patience, it cannot be accomplished."

Upon hearing this, Qiao Yongkang was first stunned, then nearly moved to tears.

— Everyone in this world looked down on him. His mother had scolded him since childhood, his father favored his half-brother, and even his wife was openly unfaithful to him...

Yet His Majesty understood him so well!!!

His Majesty's words were so apt. Woodworking was indeed a meticulous craft. How could anyone careless accomplish it?

His Majesty understood him, and that made everything worthwhile!

Excited, he raised his cup and drank one after another, experiencing for the first time in his life such unbridled joy!

...

While the emperor and his officials were drinking merrily in Xiangyun Hall, the atmosphere among the female guests, where Yanshu was seated, was rather peculiar.

— Presumably wanting to leave a good impression of being virtuous and capable on the Empress Dowager, whenever the Empress Dowager praised a dish, the Yue family's daughter would voluntarily explain how to prepare it, from ingredient selection to knife skills to cooking time, speaking knowledgeably about every aspect.

After she had explained five or six dishes, even the Empress Dowager couldn't help but say, "For one so young, you are remarkably proficient in culinary arts. It's truly rare."

Upon hearing this, Lady Yue, the wife of Duke Qin'an's heir, immediately thanked the Empress Dowager on her sister's behalf and volunteered an explanation, "My younger sister has been particularly sensible since childhood, often helping our mother manage household affairs. She learned culinary skills early on to serve our parents' meals."

The Empress Dowager nodded approvingly again, "What a filial and good child."

The Yue family's daughter immediately expressed her gratitude, "This humble subject thanks the Empress Dowager for her praise."

Seeing this, the Duchess of Qin'an revealed a satisfied smile, while Consort Zhou's eyes were practically shooting fire.

However, due to the presence of the Empress Dowager, she dared not act rashly.

Only Yanshu, unconcerned with the affairs of others, focused on eating, inwardly praising —

Mmm, tonight's dishes are really excellent!

The crystal chicken was delicious and crispy, the cherry pork was rich in flavor, the snow flower chicken was tender yet slightly chewy, seemingly even better than before.

Of course, the best was still the hanging oven roast duck.

It truly deserved its reputation as the capital's number one dish, delicious every time!

Taking a piece of fragrant golden-brown duck meat, adding some sweet bean sauce, along with fresh green onions and cucumber strips, all wrapped in a thin pancake — one bite was simply heavenly.

However, just as she was immersed in the delectable flavors, a young eunuch hurriedly ran into the hall and said to the Duchess of Qin'an and her daughter-in-law, "The young master has drunk too much at the banquet in Xiangyun Hall. His Majesty requests that you both go to check on him."

This announcement startled everyone.

What? Duke Qin'an's heir had drunk too much?

And at a royal banquet where the Emperor was still present?

The Duchess of Qin'an was also stunned. After recovering, she quickly tried to save face, smiling as she said, "This child usually doesn't like to drink. How did he end up drinking too much tonight?"

The Empress Dowager also said to the reporting eunuch, "It's just a bit of alcohol. Can't someone support him to rest for a while?"

But the young eunuch shook his head awkwardly, "Your Highness is unaware, the young master is currently sobbing loudly before His Majesty. No one can stop him, and he keeps shouting about divorcing his wife..."

What?

Divorce?

Everyone's eyes widened instantly.

— What was going on?

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